Dreams
by Langston Hughes
Hold fast to dreams
For if dreams die
Life is a broken-winged bird
That cannot fly.
Hold fast to dreams
For when dreams go
Life is a barren field
Frozen with snow.
Life is Fine
by Langston Hughes
I went down to the river,
I set down on the bank.
I tried to think but couldn't,
So I jumped in and sank.
I came up once and hollered!
I came up twice and cried!
If that water hadn't a-been so cold
I might've sunk and died.
But it was Cold in that water! It was cold!
I took the elevator
Sixteen floors above the ground.
I thought about my baby
And thought I would jump down.
I stood there and I hollered!
I stood there and I cried!
If it hadn't a-been so high
I might've jumped and died.
But it was High up there! It was high!
So since I'm still here livin',
I guess I will live on.
I could've died for love--
But for livin' I was born
Though you may hear me holler,
And you may see me cry--
I'll be dogged, sweet baby,
If you gonna see me die.
Life is fine! Fine as wine! Life is fine!
Tuesday, December 13, 2005
Thursday, December 08, 2005
One sight for sore eyes
The Van Pelt Library at UPenn, on a weekday night during exam period is surely a sight to see. Every desk, chair, and computer terminal was occupied. There wasn’t even a place to sit on the sofas and lounge chairs. The little space that seemed available from far away revealed papers and bookbags on closer inspection, evidence that some late-nighter would return. I was actually crowded out of the library. (It’s sad). I laughed, chatted with the security guard, and went to the lesser-known Engineering lab instead.
Sunday, December 04, 2005
Excerpts from a Letter
Didn't get as much work done as I wanted to. Plenty earlier, but not now. Spent too much time losing heart about work. Wrote the following earlier to a friend, not included in its entirety, but enough to paint a picture
"I’ve been working so hard in the past few weeks, I haven’t had much time to get out and socialize. I feel like I’ve sacrificed one need for another, and placed career once more before friends. It isn’t exactly that dire -- nothing, physically, has changed. I have not lost or angered any new friends, but I feel like I spent so much time working, I haven’t been able to forge new ones! This is my first semester here, and (breathless) what a rush everything has been, but now it is ending, my finals are eminent, I am contemplating what to do when the majority of the students leave for winter break, and I am confronted with the harsh reality that I really haven’t nurtured many friendships at all! It isn’t so bad -- I’m not here to network or win a popularity contest, but when I look back on my day, I see all that I’ve accomplished, but also that I have no one to share it with, no one! It is then that I entertain notions of life being sad, work being futile, and all of those nihilistic, cynical, existential views of life being true!"
"I received your last letter warmly. ... How I wish you were here, and we could reminisce, and talk about our families, teachers, frustrations, and theories. UPenn is everything I wanted it to be, but my time here has not been perfect. I took on too many obligations to save a little time and money, and I’m not sure how far it has all gotten me. I try not to worry every day. There is no one to listen to me. I have one friend who I see regularly, but he breaks schedules and does not listen very well."
"You really shouldn't let me wander off on tangents so much. There is just so much that has gone on since I saw you last. I miss you. I did not want it to be this way exactly, but I suppose more has gone right for me than has gone wrong, and that is something to be grateful for. I have so many things to do now. You'll hear from me again. Take care."
"I’ve been working so hard in the past few weeks, I haven’t had much time to get out and socialize. I feel like I’ve sacrificed one need for another, and placed career once more before friends. It isn’t exactly that dire -- nothing, physically, has changed. I have not lost or angered any new friends, but I feel like I spent so much time working, I haven’t been able to forge new ones! This is my first semester here, and (breathless) what a rush everything has been, but now it is ending, my finals are eminent, I am contemplating what to do when the majority of the students leave for winter break, and I am confronted with the harsh reality that I really haven’t nurtured many friendships at all! It isn’t so bad -- I’m not here to network or win a popularity contest, but when I look back on my day, I see all that I’ve accomplished, but also that I have no one to share it with, no one! It is then that I entertain notions of life being sad, work being futile, and all of those nihilistic, cynical, existential views of life being true!"
"I received your last letter warmly. ... How I wish you were here, and we could reminisce, and talk about our families, teachers, frustrations, and theories. UPenn is everything I wanted it to be, but my time here has not been perfect. I took on too many obligations to save a little time and money, and I’m not sure how far it has all gotten me. I try not to worry every day. There is no one to listen to me. I have one friend who I see regularly, but he breaks schedules and does not listen very well."
"You really shouldn't let me wander off on tangents so much. There is just so much that has gone on since I saw you last. I miss you. I did not want it to be this way exactly, but I suppose more has gone right for me than has gone wrong, and that is something to be grateful for. I have so many things to do now. You'll hear from me again. Take care."
Impulse arrested spills over
Some light reading before heavy exam time. …I must motivate myself to learn science, true science, which is deep and realistic, and not the superficial stuff science fiction is based on. Revisiting passages from Brave New World. This is fiction, and dystopian at that, but it’s well written. Makes one want to study and feel that one’s work is important. So divided on opinions on Aldous Huxley, (love his intelligence, but hate his convictions) but not enough time to explore that now. What I need now is motivation. I have it. Time to get to work.
“Mother, monogamy, romance. High spurts the fountain; fierce and foamy the wild jet. The urge has but a single outlet. My love, my baby. No wonder these poor pre-moderns were mad and wicked and miserable. Their world didn't allow them to take things easily, didn't allow them to be sane, virtuous, happy. What with mothers and lovers, what with the prohibitions they were not conditioned to obey, what with the temptations and the lonely remorses, what with all the diseases and the endless isolating pain, what with the uncertainties and the poverty–they were forced to feel strongly. And feeling strongly (and strongly, what was more, in solitude, in hopelessly individual isolation), how could they be stable?”
“Impulse arrested spills over, and the flood is feeling, the flood is passion, the flood is even madness: it depends on the force of the current, the height and strength of the barrier. The unchecked stream flows smoothly down its appointed channels into a calm well-being. (The embryo is hungry; day in, day out, the blood-surrogate pump unceasingly turns its eight hundred revolutions a minute. The decanted infant howls; at once a nurse appears with a bottle of external secretion. Feeling lurks in that interval of time between desire and its consummation. Shorten that interval, break down all those old unnecessary barriers.”
--Aldous Huxley, Brave New World, chp 3
“Mother, monogamy, romance. High spurts the fountain; fierce and foamy the wild jet. The urge has but a single outlet. My love, my baby. No wonder these poor pre-moderns were mad and wicked and miserable. Their world didn't allow them to take things easily, didn't allow them to be sane, virtuous, happy. What with mothers and lovers, what with the prohibitions they were not conditioned to obey, what with the temptations and the lonely remorses, what with all the diseases and the endless isolating pain, what with the uncertainties and the poverty–they were forced to feel strongly. And feeling strongly (and strongly, what was more, in solitude, in hopelessly individual isolation), how could they be stable?”
“Impulse arrested spills over, and the flood is feeling, the flood is passion, the flood is even madness: it depends on the force of the current, the height and strength of the barrier. The unchecked stream flows smoothly down its appointed channels into a calm well-being. (The embryo is hungry; day in, day out, the blood-surrogate pump unceasingly turns its eight hundred revolutions a minute. The decanted infant howls; at once a nurse appears with a bottle of external secretion. Feeling lurks in that interval of time between desire and its consummation. Shorten that interval, break down all those old unnecessary barriers.”
--Aldous Huxley, Brave New World, chp 3
Saturday, December 03, 2005
"Oft expectation fails, and most oft there / Where most it promises; and oft it hits / Where hope is coldest, and despair most fits."
--W.S., All's Well That Ends Well (II, i, 145-147)
Some days are just long -- long, long, boring and shadowed with the cloud of inescapable tasks. I have an exam this Wednesday, and another one (a final) immediately following on Thursday. I may not see the light of day this week.
Some days are just long -- long, long, boring and shadowed with the cloud of inescapable tasks. I have an exam this Wednesday, and another one (a final) immediately following on Thursday. I may not see the light of day this week.
Tuesday, November 29, 2005
Curbing my enthusiasm
I went to the video store tonight and someone had actually rented Gilmore Girls Season 4 before I could. I narrowed down the alternatives to two TV series: The Nanny and Curb Your Enthusiasm. Out of want to try something new I chose Curb Your Enthusiasm.
I found the show rather crass. I appreciate what Larry David is trying to do in portraying his life, but there are simply too many dirty jokes in it for my tastes. I find them “cheap shots” in terms of making the audience laugh. It only takes one show to realize that Larry David is appealing to a primarily male audience. Call me a pansy, but I tend to prefer shows with witty dialogue, local color, an intuitive sense of conflict, and a light-hearted sense of humor without having to refer to racial and social mores. If these shows tend to aim for a sophisticated, verbally-inclined female audience then so be it.
I found the show rather crass. I appreciate what Larry David is trying to do in portraying his life, but there are simply too many dirty jokes in it for my tastes. I find them “cheap shots” in terms of making the audience laugh. It only takes one show to realize that Larry David is appealing to a primarily male audience. Call me a pansy, but I tend to prefer shows with witty dialogue, local color, an intuitive sense of conflict, and a light-hearted sense of humor without having to refer to racial and social mores. If these shows tend to aim for a sophisticated, verbally-inclined female audience then so be it.
Saturday, November 26, 2005
The Corporate Wish List
Ah, Christmas. Here is Santa's wish list of stocks:
Apple Computer (AAPL): I know what I'm going to be thinking about when I cut into that scrumptious apple pie this holiday season: the ongoing success Apple Computer has had in its product line. Many people thought Apple was dying with the huge market share owned by PCs, but that all changed with the inception of one monumental product: the iPod. This little gizmo saved Apple's revenues and jacked the stock up -- way up. I love what Steve Jobs has done to Apple Computer. The company now pursues intelligent design to differentiate its product, and its iMacs and Power Mac G5's run on Mac OS X, different from all the rest. The company had a two-for-one stock split on February 18, 2005, and it's stock has been climbing steadily ever since. Apart from the financials, my entire biomed research lab uses the Mac, and after using it for a while, I think my next computer will be one too. I love the chic design and reliability of Apple. I love almost everything about the Mac actually; with the sole exception of how their windows take up much space and leave you less to work with on the screen. I should also mention that Steve Jobs, the CEO of Apple, is also the CEO of Pixar Animation Studios (PIXR). Pixar has produced Toy Story, Finding Nemo, and The Incredibles -- three of my favorite movies of all time! Yet another reason to love Apple, Inc!
Google, Inc (GOOG): This is another story similar to AAPL, and it's even more dramatic. I remember the days when GOOG was at $250 a share, and people were saying it was overvalued. Then it climbed to $300, then $320, and soon after their second IPO, $400. It's currently at $420 a share. It's obscene. I watched in blank horror as it's stock kept climbing and I knew I didn't own a single share! I wanted it, but I already owned one tech stock, and according to my diversification standards (which I follow religiously), I couldn't own one more. (Plus, I admit, it's multiple was too high and it was just too rich for my blood... with the pennies I invest with, I would have only owned one share!). Oh, the humanity!
Yahoo Inc. (YHOO): Yet another tech success story, when will the pain end!??? Fine, I don't own YHOO. I've been riding on Intel (INTC) all this time, and I still believe it's a good play. Under most considerations, I'd prefer Google over Yahoo (this blog is written with Google technology after all...), but Yahoo is still unmatched in several areas. Take Yahoo Finance, or Yahoo GeoCities for instance. Yahoo Finance alone makes Yahoo all worth it. It offers a humongous number of user-friendly finance tools I couldn't dream of, and the internet (Yahoo and all its competitors combined) has really changed the way I live and interact with the world. Take the stock market for instance. How else would a simple street urchin like me be able to research stocks and trade securities like a broker? This is a bit of an extension, but I attribute some of this power to Yahoo, for making the web friendly for all of us, and this stock definitely gets my approval rating of the year.
Amgen (AMGN): Where would $60 in June have gotten me today if I had invested in AMGN? $22 richer per share if you ask me. Amgen is a great biotech company to invest in. They have a stable pipeline, and they're relatively young, with room left for growth. The biotech mine is still largely untapped. Amgen's products are based on sound science and it's interesting how they've managed to study and "mimic" the biology of cells to produce innovative new products like Epogen for treating age-old diseases (as opposed to researching small drug molecules for targeting certain cell receptors). I'm not going to get into this too much right now, but I certainly wish I owned this stock.
McDonald's (MCD): This is more of a stock for last year, but I'm listing it because I wanted to buy it when I first saw it in 2004, and I was completely right about it when I checked the numbers a year later (if I had invested in it the time that I wanted to, I would have made about $7 a share). McDonald's is like a tried-and-true friend to me. The company gets a bad rap because they target a lower-income market, they don't charge much for their products (hence the term, VALUE meal), and they duplicate stores (as you would expect any restaurant chain to). I don't give in to the plain snobbery that some have towards McDonald's though. I think it's mostly because McDonald's makes cheap products for what tends-to-be poor consumers -- but heck, I grew up in Jersey City, I was raised to like fast food, and I'm not going to lie about their food tasting better than some of the stuff that comes out of high-end restaurants. (Many of them are great, don't get me wrong, but there tends to be a great deal of variability within restaurants). In a country where people count calories and cholesterol levels, it's obvious that McDonald's would be an easy target for the public, but if you eat there, you're making a concession to be eating primarily fried foods high in calories. You don't see fast food diners getting as bad a rap. It's your responsibility to watch your weight, not theirs. Furthermore, I think there's a great deal of exaggeration about the hazard of eating McDonaldland's foods. Yes, they have preservatives. Yes, they salt their foods -- but it's not like they're serving you rat poison in a burger. I think there's a great deal of exaggeration involved when people start talking about poisons, preservatives, free radicals, and carcinogens in McDonald's foods. There would be a huge liability risk for McDonald's if it was true, and if it was, I think the settlement package would more than make up for any grievances. People are so blind to the good that McDonald's does. When have they considered the Ronald McDonald House Charities the company sponsors, or how the restaurant offers healthy alternatives like milk and orange juice to its soda, not to mention the $1 side salad? I think the average McDonald's customer is satisfied with his or her order -- all of my friends from Jersey City certainly were. It wasn't until I moved to the suburbs that I started hearing bad raps about McDonald's, and all this while the company was making money and the stock was doing well. I also know something that many people tend to forget as they get older: kids love McDonald's. They love the burgers, the fries, and those colorful happy meal boxes. McDonald's also has great management and they know how to negotiate. Do you remember when McDonald's teamed up with Ty Beanie Babies or Neopets? What about Hasbro and Parker Brother's Monopoly? A look at their sheets will tell you that McDonald's has over $4.5 billion in operating cash flow, with about $1.5 billion in free cash flow. Management knows what it's doing and it's doing it right. MCD is a great stock to own. It's proved itself time and time again, they have a great international presence, the company will probably still be standing when I die, and they offer good dividends. With it's long history, MCD is no longer a value play, but it's still a damn good growth stock to own.
Citigroup (C): Have you seen all the Citibank and Citicard advertisements lately? There are a million of them! I see them all over NJ and PA when I'm on my way to New York City. It's part of Charles Prince's (CEO) aggressive advertisement campaign. Citigroup offers competitive rates and valuable service, and their CitiRewards credit card offers one of the best deals to consumers. Citigroup has also won Glendale Federal Bank vs. the United States, and recently acquired the First American Bank in Texas (FAB), to offer more than just a strong presence in the East Coast. To add to this, Citigroup has a diversified asset management base, has been growing steadily in revenues, is trying to command a stronger international presence, and is buying back common shares: a good sign! I'm hoping to use it to add some stability to my somewhat volatile-at-the-moment portfolio. It's just too bad I didn't get it earlier when I was already thinking about it at $44 a share.
I think these five stocks should give anyone an idea of what kind of companies I like and why I like them. I did also want to talk about Amazon (AMZN), Dell (DELL), eBay Inc. (EBAY), Dow Chemical (DOW), Deere and Co. (DE), 3M Co. (MMM), Johnson & Johnson (JNJ), Microsoft (MSFT), Conoco Philips (COP), and JP Morgan and Chase (JPM). Alas, I'm tired. That will have to wait for another day.
I did, however, come up with a list of business leaders I now officially admire.
My new business role models include:
Larry Page and Sergey Brin, Cofounders of GOOGLE
Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple Computer and Pixar Studios
David Filo and Jerry Yang, Cofounders of Yahoo!
(by the way, did anyone know that YAHOO was originally an acronym for "Yet Another Hierarchical Officious Oracle"?)
Bill Gates, you know… Chairman and Founder of Microsoft
Warren Buffett, Chairman of Berkshire Hathaway, "revered investor," and second richest man in America, after Bill Gates
Pierre Omidyar, Founder and Chairman of eBay
Jeffrey P. Bezos, Founder and Chairman of Amazon
This basically makes my reading list for the month.
Apple Computer (AAPL): I know what I'm going to be thinking about when I cut into that scrumptious apple pie this holiday season: the ongoing success Apple Computer has had in its product line. Many people thought Apple was dying with the huge market share owned by PCs, but that all changed with the inception of one monumental product: the iPod. This little gizmo saved Apple's revenues and jacked the stock up -- way up. I love what Steve Jobs has done to Apple Computer. The company now pursues intelligent design to differentiate its product, and its iMacs and Power Mac G5's run on Mac OS X, different from all the rest. The company had a two-for-one stock split on February 18, 2005, and it's stock has been climbing steadily ever since. Apart from the financials, my entire biomed research lab uses the Mac, and after using it for a while, I think my next computer will be one too. I love the chic design and reliability of Apple. I love almost everything about the Mac actually; with the sole exception of how their windows take up much space and leave you less to work with on the screen. I should also mention that Steve Jobs, the CEO of Apple, is also the CEO of Pixar Animation Studios (PIXR). Pixar has produced Toy Story, Finding Nemo, and The Incredibles -- three of my favorite movies of all time! Yet another reason to love Apple, Inc!
Google, Inc (GOOG): This is another story similar to AAPL, and it's even more dramatic. I remember the days when GOOG was at $250 a share, and people were saying it was overvalued. Then it climbed to $300, then $320, and soon after their second IPO, $400. It's currently at $420 a share. It's obscene. I watched in blank horror as it's stock kept climbing and I knew I didn't own a single share! I wanted it, but I already owned one tech stock, and according to my diversification standards (which I follow religiously), I couldn't own one more. (Plus, I admit, it's multiple was too high and it was just too rich for my blood... with the pennies I invest with, I would have only owned one share!). Oh, the humanity!
Yahoo Inc. (YHOO): Yet another tech success story, when will the pain end!??? Fine, I don't own YHOO. I've been riding on Intel (INTC) all this time, and I still believe it's a good play. Under most considerations, I'd prefer Google over Yahoo (this blog is written with Google technology after all...), but Yahoo is still unmatched in several areas. Take Yahoo Finance, or Yahoo GeoCities for instance. Yahoo Finance alone makes Yahoo all worth it. It offers a humongous number of user-friendly finance tools I couldn't dream of, and the internet (Yahoo and all its competitors combined) has really changed the way I live and interact with the world. Take the stock market for instance. How else would a simple street urchin like me be able to research stocks and trade securities like a broker? This is a bit of an extension, but I attribute some of this power to Yahoo, for making the web friendly for all of us, and this stock definitely gets my approval rating of the year.
Amgen (AMGN): Where would $60 in June have gotten me today if I had invested in AMGN? $22 richer per share if you ask me. Amgen is a great biotech company to invest in. They have a stable pipeline, and they're relatively young, with room left for growth. The biotech mine is still largely untapped. Amgen's products are based on sound science and it's interesting how they've managed to study and "mimic" the biology of cells to produce innovative new products like Epogen for treating age-old diseases (as opposed to researching small drug molecules for targeting certain cell receptors). I'm not going to get into this too much right now, but I certainly wish I owned this stock.
McDonald's (MCD): This is more of a stock for last year, but I'm listing it because I wanted to buy it when I first saw it in 2004, and I was completely right about it when I checked the numbers a year later (if I had invested in it the time that I wanted to, I would have made about $7 a share). McDonald's is like a tried-and-true friend to me. The company gets a bad rap because they target a lower-income market, they don't charge much for their products (hence the term, VALUE meal), and they duplicate stores (as you would expect any restaurant chain to). I don't give in to the plain snobbery that some have towards McDonald's though. I think it's mostly because McDonald's makes cheap products for what tends-to-be poor consumers -- but heck, I grew up in Jersey City, I was raised to like fast food, and I'm not going to lie about their food tasting better than some of the stuff that comes out of high-end restaurants. (Many of them are great, don't get me wrong, but there tends to be a great deal of variability within restaurants). In a country where people count calories and cholesterol levels, it's obvious that McDonald's would be an easy target for the public, but if you eat there, you're making a concession to be eating primarily fried foods high in calories. You don't see fast food diners getting as bad a rap. It's your responsibility to watch your weight, not theirs. Furthermore, I think there's a great deal of exaggeration about the hazard of eating McDonaldland's foods. Yes, they have preservatives. Yes, they salt their foods -- but it's not like they're serving you rat poison in a burger. I think there's a great deal of exaggeration involved when people start talking about poisons, preservatives, free radicals, and carcinogens in McDonald's foods. There would be a huge liability risk for McDonald's if it was true, and if it was, I think the settlement package would more than make up for any grievances. People are so blind to the good that McDonald's does. When have they considered the Ronald McDonald House Charities the company sponsors, or how the restaurant offers healthy alternatives like milk and orange juice to its soda, not to mention the $1 side salad? I think the average McDonald's customer is satisfied with his or her order -- all of my friends from Jersey City certainly were. It wasn't until I moved to the suburbs that I started hearing bad raps about McDonald's, and all this while the company was making money and the stock was doing well. I also know something that many people tend to forget as they get older: kids love McDonald's. They love the burgers, the fries, and those colorful happy meal boxes. McDonald's also has great management and they know how to negotiate. Do you remember when McDonald's teamed up with Ty Beanie Babies or Neopets? What about Hasbro and Parker Brother's Monopoly? A look at their sheets will tell you that McDonald's has over $4.5 billion in operating cash flow, with about $1.5 billion in free cash flow. Management knows what it's doing and it's doing it right. MCD is a great stock to own. It's proved itself time and time again, they have a great international presence, the company will probably still be standing when I die, and they offer good dividends. With it's long history, MCD is no longer a value play, but it's still a damn good growth stock to own.
Citigroup (C): Have you seen all the Citibank and Citicard advertisements lately? There are a million of them! I see them all over NJ and PA when I'm on my way to New York City. It's part of Charles Prince's (CEO) aggressive advertisement campaign. Citigroup offers competitive rates and valuable service, and their CitiRewards credit card offers one of the best deals to consumers. Citigroup has also won Glendale Federal Bank vs. the United States, and recently acquired the First American Bank in Texas (FAB), to offer more than just a strong presence in the East Coast. To add to this, Citigroup has a diversified asset management base, has been growing steadily in revenues, is trying to command a stronger international presence, and is buying back common shares: a good sign! I'm hoping to use it to add some stability to my somewhat volatile-at-the-moment portfolio. It's just too bad I didn't get it earlier when I was already thinking about it at $44 a share.
I think these five stocks should give anyone an idea of what kind of companies I like and why I like them. I did also want to talk about Amazon (AMZN), Dell (DELL), eBay Inc. (EBAY), Dow Chemical (DOW), Deere and Co. (DE), 3M Co. (MMM), Johnson & Johnson (JNJ), Microsoft (MSFT), Conoco Philips (COP), and JP Morgan and Chase (JPM). Alas, I'm tired. That will have to wait for another day.
I did, however, come up with a list of business leaders I now officially admire.
My new business role models include:
Larry Page and Sergey Brin, Cofounders of GOOGLE
Steve Jobs, CEO of Apple Computer and Pixar Studios
David Filo and Jerry Yang, Cofounders of Yahoo!
(by the way, did anyone know that YAHOO was originally an acronym for "Yet Another Hierarchical Officious Oracle"?)
Bill Gates, you know… Chairman and Founder of Microsoft
Warren Buffett, Chairman of Berkshire Hathaway, "revered investor," and second richest man in America, after Bill Gates
Pierre Omidyar, Founder and Chairman of eBay
Jeffrey P. Bezos, Founder and Chairman of Amazon
This basically makes my reading list for the month.
Thursday, November 24, 2005
Redefining Prosperity
I went to Springfield for Thanksgiving, and soon as I came in, he was busy chopping up vegetables, preparing the cranberry sauce, mashing the sweet potatoes and making the signature sweet potato bread rolls. Bored and left to my devices, I went online to check the performances of certain stocks, something I haven't been able to do since I last visited him from UPenn. He pried my fingers off from the keyboard as soon as he realized what I was doing, and went back on ten minutes later to check the most recent news about the Noreaster hitting our coast and pending forecasts of rain and snow.
This Thanksgiving may be bordering on a bit strange, but this year, I have several things to be thankful for:
The first one would have to be the Puppy and his own brand of lovableness. He likes making things, giving them to you, and making you feel special. He's interested in just about everything you can find around the house, and looks especially adorable when he's planting fall bulbs, buying pet fish, or making apple pie. I don't feel like I'm at home in my own apartment, which I pretty much only use for sleep; but I feel like I'm home wherever he is.
The second thing I have to be thankful for is the lab and the new changes I've made in studying the mouse model. Drosophila is an excellent model organism for genetics, but I can only go so far in it if I want to study topics of a medically-relevant basis. The mouse is infinitely closer to the human than flies are, but they present challenges that geneticists must concede if they want to focus their energies on this model. Working at the Labosky lab has taught me much about mammalian development and has allowed me to get my foot-in-the-door on stem cell research. Currently, I work on liver bud development, but I'm expecting to have an increase in responsibilities soon. Yesterday, Dr. Tremblay told me about CRE-mediated diptheria toxin production and the new genetically-controlled ablation technique in developmental biology research. This makes it possible to perform ablation techniques on mammals in vivo.
Working in close proximity to Wharton and many business-minded people is changing the way I think about science and the world. I've recently made the academic switch from genetics and a developmental biology focus to pharmacology, and soon, nanotechnology. Genetics and stem cells are interesting, have only marginally been tapped as a medical resource, and have great potential for therapeutics; but for the moment, advances in these fields are too speculative for me and unattractive to investors.
I'm thankful that I've found something that calls to me and is rewarding on a material, physical basis as well. I used to think that genes, poetry, literature, and the human genome were the only things worthy of my time, but I've come to add the stock market to that hodge-podge assortment as well. Now here is a dynamic system that changes, challenges me, uses my skills, is inexhaustible (like Shakespeare, or Merrill...), and is understandably important as well. It makes me feel like I have a personal stake in the economy, and motivates me to learn more and more about it...
There is a world outside of academia. There are companies that would pay me to be mad and neurotic, and find new molecules for them; places where I can be myself, and be with other smart people that will challenge and stimulate me. Initially, I wanted to be an academic because I thought it was the only place where I could learn forever and escape being given some rote task that would bore me to the grave. I'm the sort of person that requires a high degree of stimulation. When I first entered the marble halls of the Metropolitan Museum of Art, I gazed around and around and was dumbstruck with awe. I want to emulate that feeling; and make it happen in my life. I like finance. I like investing. I want to be a business-scientist, and I feel, intrinsically, that I'll always be a poet as well. Academies are so quick to encourage polymaths, Renaissance men, and people with varied interests. Why can't they be enthusiastic about business as well? If students are taught Einstein, Shakespeare, and Virgil, shouldn't they be taught how to do a little more than balance a checkbook as well?
It's Thanksgiving, and I have a couple of other things to be thankful for as well before this night comes to a close:
Parents and family: as annoying and misunderstanding as they can be at times, they're there when you need them, they've known you growing up, and they intrinsically mean well. You can't fault them for everything.
My education: it's made me who I am, it's shaped my ego, and it's exposed me to a myriad assortment of people and philosophies I would have otherwise never known. Here's to you: McNair Academic, Penn, and Drew
Jersey City: you're not so bad. You're dirty, poor, mismanaged, overpopulated, and uncared for, but you played a part in shaping who I am, if only to make me aware of what I had to escape from, and you made me want to try every bit of the world I could. You're not so bad.
Friends: without naming any specific person in particular, all of you are different and represent some different aspect or stage in my life. Not all of you could stay with me through the years, but it was mutual while it lasted, we shared some joys, you taught me something about the world I never knew, and even if it ended on a bad note, I don't think I'd take back ever meeting you.
As Mark Twain once said, "Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of joy you must have somebody to divide it with."
Have a Happy Thanksgiving.
This Thanksgiving may be bordering on a bit strange, but this year, I have several things to be thankful for:
The first one would have to be the Puppy and his own brand of lovableness. He likes making things, giving them to you, and making you feel special. He's interested in just about everything you can find around the house, and looks especially adorable when he's planting fall bulbs, buying pet fish, or making apple pie. I don't feel like I'm at home in my own apartment, which I pretty much only use for sleep; but I feel like I'm home wherever he is.
The second thing I have to be thankful for is the lab and the new changes I've made in studying the mouse model. Drosophila is an excellent model organism for genetics, but I can only go so far in it if I want to study topics of a medically-relevant basis. The mouse is infinitely closer to the human than flies are, but they present challenges that geneticists must concede if they want to focus their energies on this model. Working at the Labosky lab has taught me much about mammalian development and has allowed me to get my foot-in-the-door on stem cell research. Currently, I work on liver bud development, but I'm expecting to have an increase in responsibilities soon. Yesterday, Dr. Tremblay told me about CRE-mediated diptheria toxin production and the new genetically-controlled ablation technique in developmental biology research. This makes it possible to perform ablation techniques on mammals in vivo.
Working in close proximity to Wharton and many business-minded people is changing the way I think about science and the world. I've recently made the academic switch from genetics and a developmental biology focus to pharmacology, and soon, nanotechnology. Genetics and stem cells are interesting, have only marginally been tapped as a medical resource, and have great potential for therapeutics; but for the moment, advances in these fields are too speculative for me and unattractive to investors.
I'm thankful that I've found something that calls to me and is rewarding on a material, physical basis as well. I used to think that genes, poetry, literature, and the human genome were the only things worthy of my time, but I've come to add the stock market to that hodge-podge assortment as well. Now here is a dynamic system that changes, challenges me, uses my skills, is inexhaustible (like Shakespeare, or Merrill...), and is understandably important as well. It makes me feel like I have a personal stake in the economy, and motivates me to learn more and more about it...
There is a world outside of academia. There are companies that would pay me to be mad and neurotic, and find new molecules for them; places where I can be myself, and be with other smart people that will challenge and stimulate me. Initially, I wanted to be an academic because I thought it was the only place where I could learn forever and escape being given some rote task that would bore me to the grave. I'm the sort of person that requires a high degree of stimulation. When I first entered the marble halls of the Metropolitan Museum of Art, I gazed around and around and was dumbstruck with awe. I want to emulate that feeling; and make it happen in my life. I like finance. I like investing. I want to be a business-scientist, and I feel, intrinsically, that I'll always be a poet as well. Academies are so quick to encourage polymaths, Renaissance men, and people with varied interests. Why can't they be enthusiastic about business as well? If students are taught Einstein, Shakespeare, and Virgil, shouldn't they be taught how to do a little more than balance a checkbook as well?
It's Thanksgiving, and I have a couple of other things to be thankful for as well before this night comes to a close:
Parents and family: as annoying and misunderstanding as they can be at times, they're there when you need them, they've known you growing up, and they intrinsically mean well. You can't fault them for everything.
My education: it's made me who I am, it's shaped my ego, and it's exposed me to a myriad assortment of people and philosophies I would have otherwise never known. Here's to you: McNair Academic, Penn, and Drew
Jersey City: you're not so bad. You're dirty, poor, mismanaged, overpopulated, and uncared for, but you played a part in shaping who I am, if only to make me aware of what I had to escape from, and you made me want to try every bit of the world I could. You're not so bad.
Friends: without naming any specific person in particular, all of you are different and represent some different aspect or stage in my life. Not all of you could stay with me through the years, but it was mutual while it lasted, we shared some joys, you taught me something about the world I never knew, and even if it ended on a bad note, I don't think I'd take back ever meeting you.
As Mark Twain once said, "Grief can take care of itself, but to get the full value of joy you must have somebody to divide it with."
Have a Happy Thanksgiving.
Friday, November 18, 2005
Now is the winter of our discontent....
How did it get so cold so quickly in the Northeast? I can hardly type...
Let’s huddle together for warmth!
I can’t wait for December, not that I particularly like winter above all seasons, but I want school to end. I want to have finals behind me. I want to breathe, and to be able to hear myself think for once. I couldn’t care less about the Urea Cycle in Biochemistry. We’re going to have a third exam in Pharmacology on Pharmacokinetics. The Segel text is like James Joyce in numbers. Darwin, help me now!
Let’s huddle together for warmth!
I can’t wait for December, not that I particularly like winter above all seasons, but I want school to end. I want to have finals behind me. I want to breathe, and to be able to hear myself think for once. I couldn’t care less about the Urea Cycle in Biochemistry. We’re going to have a third exam in Pharmacology on Pharmacokinetics. The Segel text is like James Joyce in numbers. Darwin, help me now!
Thursday, November 17, 2005
The Living
It occurred to me that I don't have a single example of my poetry on this journal. What a pity that would be, and to think: what better than a poem to bespeak one formerly known as Poet! This is one of my non-rhyming ones, as most of my poems are written in rhyme. I wrote this while I was still studying at Drew.
The Living
Hunger of the flesh eats like a maggot in the rind.
Hunger of the mind beats like steam in the kettle.
Hunger limb for limb tearing at the old balustrades,
And the granite obelisk erected for the dawn
Are nothing more but a rack of ruins by night.
Somewhere a million stars are exploding,
Extinguished – the supernovas, blasting through the cosmos
Blazing the lonely panegyric of the sky.
We are all dying. It is programmed in our cells.
Six million of me succumbing to senescence.
I am a city, encomium of the world,
And this foot, this finger, hanging on a tendon
Are my sole tributes to mortality.
Like a studded glove it hits. Here is a knucklebone.
Here is a ruptured jaw. Take the old mandible
And boil it in water. Ferment it with onions.
Make bone soup. It is better this way.
From whence it came, salt and sulfur,
Blood and brine. We are all elements primordial,
And this boiling acid soup, ballast water,
And seminal fluid, tiny old homunculus of the world
Are a pot thickened with people. To live is to hunger.
Drive me desire. Take this umbilicus,
Dip your spoon, and dig in.
--N.D. Pura, 2005
The Living
Hunger of the flesh eats like a maggot in the rind.
Hunger of the mind beats like steam in the kettle.
Hunger limb for limb tearing at the old balustrades,
And the granite obelisk erected for the dawn
Are nothing more but a rack of ruins by night.
Somewhere a million stars are exploding,
Extinguished – the supernovas, blasting through the cosmos
Blazing the lonely panegyric of the sky.
We are all dying. It is programmed in our cells.
Six million of me succumbing to senescence.
I am a city, encomium of the world,
And this foot, this finger, hanging on a tendon
Are my sole tributes to mortality.
Like a studded glove it hits. Here is a knucklebone.
Here is a ruptured jaw. Take the old mandible
And boil it in water. Ferment it with onions.
Make bone soup. It is better this way.
From whence it came, salt and sulfur,
Blood and brine. We are all elements primordial,
And this boiling acid soup, ballast water,
And seminal fluid, tiny old homunculus of the world
Are a pot thickened with people. To live is to hunger.
Drive me desire. Take this umbilicus,
Dip your spoon, and dig in.
--N.D. Pura, 2005
New Yorkers think they live in the center of the universe. Then you visit for the weekend and realize that they're right.
I went to New Jersey and New York this weekend to visit Mike and Kevin. Mike was big, blue-eyed and happy to see to me and it made my entire week to see him after what seemed like an eternity (five days). The next day the two of us went to visit Kevin in Manhattan, who was urbane, well-shaven, blunt, and insulting in the endearing sort of way. Then, we had dinner at a Thai restaurant where he and Mike pointed out nearly every little Asian nuance the restaurant could pull off to give the customer a unique "Asian" experience (including me for that matter). We wandered for a bit until Mike got bored and started pointing out tourists. I love New York. I miss its flashy window displays, its boutique shops, the traffic, the people, Washington Square, and that sense of speed and energy that must come from constantly being in the middle of things. I claim to have "New York blood" in my veins (as an extension of my Hudson-county upbringing), but I have my own reasons for living in Philadelphia (cost of living, parents, city taxes, school...). I know I’ll return to live there one day. I just don’t know when.
I'm feeling lucky
I'm feeling lucky
Friday, November 11, 2005
The Founders Speak
I’m not really the type of person to extol high-profile CEO’s I’ve never met before, but Larry Page and Sergey Brin are different. They’re the founders of GOOGLE. We touched upon the Google story briefly today in Entrepreneurship class when discussing IPOs. The conversation piqued my curiosity enough to look into it a little more (click on the title link above).
It’s really quite interesting. What I’m posting is a link to a SEC filing that came out in 2004, but it’s also a Letter from the Founders to investors. It’s essentially their “Letter to the World” (I’m reminded of that marvelous scene in ATLAS SHRUGGED when the protagonist steps up to the microphone and brazenly says, “This is John Galt Speaking.” This isn’t exactly the same thing, but it comes pretty damn close). Google is a remarkable, relatively young company that I’ve grown to have tremendous respect for. They have a young, ingenious, new product that continues to do more and more. They’re not motivated simply by short-term gains, but love of innovation and technology. They have a sense of social responsibility and an awareness of what their technology means to the world. The last time mankind attempted to the harness the knowledge of the world in one spot was with the Library of Alexandria. Now we have Google, and at several billion webpages of net searching, they’re still growing.
Read the Letter if you can. SEC filings are usually dry, dusty, and filled with the financial and legal jargon only an MBA would understand, but this one is different. It’s bold, brazen, funny, and has that wonderful dash of humanism. Yes, there are companies out there that do have a soul. Google is one of them. The statement is long, but there are some notable passages:
Google’s mission is to organize the world’s information and make it universally accessible and useful. When we started Google in 1998 out of Stanford University, we searched about 30 million web pages. And at the time that was pretty competitive. That was about as big as most search engines, not quite as big as the biggest, but we soon overcame those. Now we’re searching many billions of web pages, so over a hundred times bigger, and Google works well...
Our employees, who have named themselves Googlers, are everything. Google is organized around the ability to attract and leverage the talent of exceptional technologists and business people. We have been lucky to recruit many creative, principled and hard working stars. We hope to recruit many more in the future. We will reward and treat them well...
The significant employee ownership of Google has made us what we are today. Because of our employee talent, Google is doing exciting work in nearly every area of computer science. We are in a very competitive industry where the quality of our product is paramount. Talented people are attracted to Google because we empower them to change the world; Google has large computational resources and distribution that enables individuals to make a difference. Our main benefit is a workplace with important projects, where employees can contribute and grow. We are focused on providing an environment where talented, hard working people are rewarded for their contributions to Google and for making the world a better place...
Don’t be evil. We believe strongly that in the long term, we will be better served--as shareholders and in all other ways--by a company that does good things for the world even if we forgo some short term gains. This is an important aspect of our culture and is broadly shared within the company...
Google users trust our systems to help them with important decisions: medical, financial and many others. Our search results are the best we know how to produce. They are unbiased and objective, and we do not accept payment for them or for inclusion or more frequent updating. We also display advertising, which we work hard to make relevant, and we label it clearly. This is similar to a well-run newspaper, where the advertisements are clear and the articles are not influenced by the advertisers’ payments. We believe it is important for everyone to have access to the best information and research, not only to the information people pay for you to see...
We aspire to make Google an institution that makes the world a better place. In pursuing this goal, we will always be mindful of our responsibilities to our shareholders, employees, customers and business partners. With our products, Google connects people and information all around the world for free. We are adding other powerful services such as Gmail, which provides an efficient one gigabyte Gmail account for free. ... AdWords connects users and advertisers efficiently, helping both. AdSense helps fund a huge variety of online web sites and enables authors who could not otherwise publish. Last year we created Google Grants—a growing program in which hundreds of non-profits addressing issues, including the environment, poverty and human rights, receive free advertising. And now, we are in the process of establishing the Google Foundation...
Google is not a conventional company. Eric, Sergey and I intend to operate Google differently, applying the values it has developed as a private company to its future as a public company. ... We will live up to our “don’t be evil” principle by keeping user trust and not accepting payment for search results. We have a dual class structure that is biased toward stability and independence and that requires investors to bet on the team...
The Management Team
Congratulations to our winners!
http://www.drew.edu/english/prizes-and-awards
It’s really quite interesting. What I’m posting is a link to a SEC filing that came out in 2004, but it’s also a Letter from the Founders to investors. It’s essentially their “Letter to the World” (I’m reminded of that marvelous scene in ATLAS SHRUGGED when the protagonist steps up to the microphone and brazenly says, “This is John Galt Speaking.” This isn’t exactly the same thing, but it comes pretty damn close). Google is a remarkable, relatively young company that I’ve grown to have tremendous respect for. They have a young, ingenious, new product that continues to do more and more. They’re not motivated simply by short-term gains, but love of innovation and technology. They have a sense of social responsibility and an awareness of what their technology means to the world. The last time mankind attempted to the harness the knowledge of the world in one spot was with the Library of Alexandria. Now we have Google, and at several billion webpages of net searching, they’re still growing.
Read the Letter if you can. SEC filings are usually dry, dusty, and filled with the financial and legal jargon only an MBA would understand, but this one is different. It’s bold, brazen, funny, and has that wonderful dash of humanism. Yes, there are companies out there that do have a soul. Google is one of them. The statement is long, but there are some notable passages:
Google’s mission is to organize the world’s information and make it universally accessible and useful. When we started Google in 1998 out of Stanford University, we searched about 30 million web pages. And at the time that was pretty competitive. That was about as big as most search engines, not quite as big as the biggest, but we soon overcame those. Now we’re searching many billions of web pages, so over a hundred times bigger, and Google works well...
Our employees, who have named themselves Googlers, are everything. Google is organized around the ability to attract and leverage the talent of exceptional technologists and business people. We have been lucky to recruit many creative, principled and hard working stars. We hope to recruit many more in the future. We will reward and treat them well...
The significant employee ownership of Google has made us what we are today. Because of our employee talent, Google is doing exciting work in nearly every area of computer science. We are in a very competitive industry where the quality of our product is paramount. Talented people are attracted to Google because we empower them to change the world; Google has large computational resources and distribution that enables individuals to make a difference. Our main benefit is a workplace with important projects, where employees can contribute and grow. We are focused on providing an environment where talented, hard working people are rewarded for their contributions to Google and for making the world a better place...
Don’t be evil. We believe strongly that in the long term, we will be better served--as shareholders and in all other ways--by a company that does good things for the world even if we forgo some short term gains. This is an important aspect of our culture and is broadly shared within the company...
Google users trust our systems to help them with important decisions: medical, financial and many others. Our search results are the best we know how to produce. They are unbiased and objective, and we do not accept payment for them or for inclusion or more frequent updating. We also display advertising, which we work hard to make relevant, and we label it clearly. This is similar to a well-run newspaper, where the advertisements are clear and the articles are not influenced by the advertisers’ payments. We believe it is important for everyone to have access to the best information and research, not only to the information people pay for you to see...
We aspire to make Google an institution that makes the world a better place. In pursuing this goal, we will always be mindful of our responsibilities to our shareholders, employees, customers and business partners. With our products, Google connects people and information all around the world for free. We are adding other powerful services such as Gmail, which provides an efficient one gigabyte Gmail account for free. ... AdWords connects users and advertisers efficiently, helping both. AdSense helps fund a huge variety of online web sites and enables authors who could not otherwise publish. Last year we created Google Grants—a growing program in which hundreds of non-profits addressing issues, including the environment, poverty and human rights, receive free advertising. And now, we are in the process of establishing the Google Foundation...
Google is not a conventional company. Eric, Sergey and I intend to operate Google differently, applying the values it has developed as a private company to its future as a public company. ... We will live up to our “don’t be evil” principle by keeping user trust and not accepting payment for search results. We have a dual class structure that is biased toward stability and independence and that requires investors to bet on the team...
The Management Team
Congratulations to our winners!
http://www.drew.edu/english/prizes-and-awards
Wednesday, November 09, 2005
Noel’s List Of The Top Ten Drugs No Civilization On Earth Should Be Without
After successfully completing two back-breaking exams, I thought I’d celebrate by posting something FUN about science. Here it is:
NOEL’S LIST OF THE TOP TEN DRUGS NO CIVILIZATION ON EARTH SHOULD BE WITHOUT
1. Anti-Inflammatory and Pain Relief Drugs
Commonly known as: Aspirin, Acetaminophen, Ibuprofen, Codeine; Common Prescription Brand Names: Endocet, Roxicet, Tylox, Tylenol with Codeine nos. 1-4, Allay, Anexia, Bancap, Ceta-Plus, Dolacet, Hydrocet, Lorcet, Lortab, Margesic, Norco, Panacet, Percocet, Stagesic, Vicodin, Zydone, Talacen, OxyContin
This is without a doubt, the most widely-used class of drugs, if not for aspirin alone. There are so many combinations available, from simple generic aspirin, to prescription Tylenol with codeine. Most people are fine with over-the-counter retail drugs, but there several prescription ones out there that are much more potent, regulated, and fun to learn about. The narcotics in particular are popular among the underground, if not downright illegal. I find the opiods vastly interesting, but they work on the CNS and really deserve their own category. Some professors would have my neck for classifying them with the NSAIDS (non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs). Anyway, pain relief seems to be the most prominent concern in the drug world, and more of these drugs are consumed than any other.
2. Drugs for Bacterial Infections
Common Brand Names: Amoxil, Trimox, Larotid, Wymox, Augmentin, Marcillin, Omnipen, Probampacin, Spectrobid, Geocillin, Cloxapen, Dycill, Pathocil, Unipen, Bactocill, Pfizerpen, Beepen, Veetids
As with the first category, there are way too many drugs here for me to list. You all get the big idea: bacteria are bad and common and when they infect us (which is usually pretty often), we need to get rid of them quickly. I’ve only listed the beta-lactam inhibitors. They work by inhibiting cell wall synthesis in bacteria. There are some other more obscure and creative drugs out there, but I’m not a big fan of bacteriology and I’d rather move on.
3. Cholesterol-Inhibiting Drugs
Common Brand Names: Lipitor, Zocor, Lescol, Altocor, Mevacor, Advicor, Pravachol, Pravigard PAC, Crestor, Zetia
This is a big one. Most people don’t realize it, but this is actually THE biggest one, at least in terms of prescription drug sales. Pfizer’s Lipitor and Merck’s Zocor are the two most prescribed, used and lucrative drugs. Aside from the economic concerns, cholesterol-inhibiting drugs are really medically important. Obesity is a big issue in America and there is a push towards research in obesity-related drugs. Cholesterol synthesis isn’t exactly the same thing as being “fat,” but it’s a common medical concern, especially with age. I know so many adults that are taking these drugs nowadays it’s obscene. Many of them aren’t even “fat,” (in my humble opinion). Next time you go home, check your parent’s drug cabinet. Chances are, at least one of them will be taking these drugs.
4. Antidepressants and Antipsychotic Drugs
Common Brand Names: Prozac, Paxil, Zoloft, Wellbutrin, Effexor, Zyprexa, Dyprexa, Celexa, Lexapro, Sarafem, Luvox, Moclebemide, Harmala, Nardil, Parnate, Marplan
Aldous Huxley once wrote:
"Two thousand pharmacologists and bio-chemists were subsidized. Six years later it was being produced commercially. The perfect drug. Euphoric, narcotic, pleasantly hallucinant. All the advantages of Christianity and alcohol; none of their defects. Take a holiday from reality whenever you like, and come back without so much as a headache or a mythology. Stability was practically assured." (Brave New World)
These drugs have received so much coverage and controversy in recent years I just had to touch on it for my sake. Huxley paints a rather grim and sterile portrait of psychoactive drugs, but if you’ve ever taken any one of these antidepressants, you’ll know that they don’t really make you instantly happy and complacent but just “color” your mood, maybe sedate you a little, and potentially give you some motivation. The human mind is far more complicated than any molecule, and it’s a bit simplistic, in my opinion, to relegate so much responsibility on a drug. You are who you are and that’s not going to change by swallowing a pill. Depression and mental health concerns are a major life issue and it’s a pity these drugs aren’t given the respect they ought to have. I don’t think people really start appreciating the power of drugs until they start taking one of these drugs. Everyone takes drugs to cure some ailment in at least at some part of his or her life, but most people just swallow the pill and forget that it’s even working. Not so with the psychoactive drugs. These drugs have the potential to make a big difference -- and not one you’re likely to forget. I don’t give into many of the hogwash theories out there about antidepressants and antipsychotic drugs changing your personality and who you are. I firmly believe that these drugs help people and save lives. They have great potential, and they definitely deserve to be on top of this list.
5. Cancer-Inhibiting Drugs
Amifostine, Aminoglutethimide, Bicalutamide, Bleomycin, Cisplatin, Cladribine, Clodronate, Filgrastim, Goserelin, Hydroxyurea, Idarubicin, Letrozole, Leucovorin, Leuprolide, Medroxyprogesterone, Megestrol, Melphalan, Mitomycin, Pentostatin, Plicamycin, Porfimer, Tamoxifen, Testosterone, Thalidomide, Thioguanine, Tretinoin, Vindesine
I list the generic instead of the brand names here, because they seem to be more relevant in this field. There’s a real push in the biotechnology world to discover these drugs. Most of the chemotherapeutic drugs for cancer now are broad-acting and have a number of undesirable side effects. They target the rapidly-dividing cells in your body, which means cancer cells, but unfortunately hair cells, skin cells, endothelial (gut lining) cells, and a numerous host of other cells as well. This is why people in chemotherapy lose their hair and have such bad nausea all the time. Much more research needs to be done in this arena. There really hasn’t been a ground-breaking drug here that’s been both safe and effective.
6. Drugs for Viral Infections
Common Brand Names: Agenerase, Combivir, Retrovir, Epivir, Crixivan, Emtriva, Epivir, Epzicom, Fortovase, Fuzeon, Hivid, Invirase, Kaletra, Lexiva, Norvir, Rescriptor, Reyataz, Sustiva, Trizivir, Videx, Viracept, Viramune, Viread, Zerit, Ziagen
You’ll hear it time and time again: there is no cure for the common cold. There still isn’t. Yet, there is a push to discover new anti-viral drugs, and it’s mostly from one high-profile and controversial disease: AIDS. This virus has decimated certain minority populations and South Africa. No one drug has really risen above all others, but treatments often involve drug cocktails that prolong life by a certain percentage. The problems with viruses are that they live inside cells and can incorporate themselves unto our own DNA. The biology behind these drugs is truly fascinating, in part because there are so many hurdles to cross. Many of these drugs are protease inhibitors or nucleoside analog reverse transcriptase inhibitors. Their modes of action are very complex.
7. Heart and Antihypertensive Drugs
way more than I care to mention, but the ones I know are: Atenolol, Metoprolol, Nadolol, Propranolol, Timolol, Norvasc, Plavix, Catapres (Clonidine), Digitoxin, Digoxin
This is a large, large category, and it hurts me as biologist to just clump them all under #7. Some of these work on receptors, some are antiplatelet, and others have complex mechanisms that would just let me ramble on and on and bore you to death. To give you an idea of their complexity, these drugs are further classified into some of the following major categories: Angiotensin-converting Enzyme Inhibitors (ACE inhibitors), Angiotensin II Receptor Antagonists, Beta blockers, Blood Vessel Dilators (Vasodilators), Calcium Channel Blockers, Diuretics, and Nerve Blockers. It really takes a cardiopharmacologist to explain them all! The bottom line is: many people have heart and cardiovascular problems and these drugs are very important. With that said, let me move on and finish this list!
8. Estradiols and Birth-control Drugs
Common Brand Names: Alesse, Lessina, Aviane, Levlite, Cryselle, Loestrin, Levlen, Levora, Microgestin, Nordette, Lo/Ovral, Low-Orgestrel, Yasmin, Portia, Loestrin, Microgestin, Zovia, Ortho-Cyclen, Sprintec, Necon, Norinyl, Ortho-Novum, Nortrel, Demulen, Ortho-Cept, Zovia, OrthoEvra, Ovral, Brevicon, NuvaRing, Norplant II, Progestrasert, Mirena, Plan B, Preven
It’s a common fact of life: people have babies that they don’t necessarily want right away or can care for. It’s only been in the past several years that women have started widely using drugs to take control of their sex lives. Just think about how horrible a world would be if people couldn’t separate the recreational and affirmative values of sex from its reproductive ones. It would be just plain MEDIEVAL. I don’t think we can maintain a healthy society that way. There would be too much concealment, detachment, desolation, and repression for me. There’s no reason for a society to regress back to the Dark Ages if the technology exists. Birth-control drugs should be legal and implemented in all countries, especially in undeveloped ones where people need it most.
9. Impotence Drugs
Common Brand Names: Viagra, Levitra, Cialis
Not as many names here as the contraceptive drugs, but the ones listed are major. For years this was the problem that many older people had but couldn’t do anything or even talk about. Now, that’s changed. The discovery of Viagra and the other cGMP inhibitors for erectile dysfunction launched a new market that has been publicized widely. People are quick to criticize and make fun of these “sex drugs” but I think they do alot of serious good in the world. People have enough problems as it is and sexual frustrations with the person you love shouldn’t have to be one of them. These problems can accumulate and seriously do harm to a person’s psychology …so, if there’s a drug for it, why not? Viagra, Levitra, and Cialis go under #9 on my list.
10. Gastrointestinal Drugs
Common Brand Names: Aciphex, Cytotec, Zegerid, Carafate, Pepcid, Axid, Tagamet, Zantac, Imodium, Opium, Meridia, Nexium, Ogastro/Prevacid, Prevpac, Prilosec, Protonix, Xenical, Adipex, Lipram, Pancrease, Ultrase, Antivert, Zofram, Emend, MiraLax, Cephulac, Reglan, Bentyl, Anaspaz, Librax, Levsin, Asacol
Most of these drugs treat ulcers, which is a common medical concern. Some of them treat heartburn. The others are proton-pump inhibitors, antacids, stomach coatings, H2 blockers, or antibiotics. As you can see, this is really a general category that includes certain drug classes, and I could even throw some of them in with anti-inflammatory and pain-relief drugs if I wanted to. I don’t really have much to say about the gastrointestinal drugs, which I personally find to be rather dull, but gastrointestinal issues seem to be the number 2 general concern after pain relief and it would be a crime not to include them in “Noel’s List of the Top Ten Drugs no Civilization on Earth should be without.”
Other drugs that didn’t make it to my list:
If I could include more than 10, I would have definitely included allergy drugs, asthma drugs, osteoporosis drugs, heartburn drugs, drugs for anemia, and anti-diabetic drugs. So many people have allergies, an equally large percentage have asthma, nearly all of the women in my life will probably be taking osteoporosis drugs after 50; and heartburn, anemia, and diabetes are just HUGE concerns. However, I must restrain myself with just 10 drugs. It wouldn’t be right to remove gastrointestinal drugs when people suffer from stomach problems all the time. I conceptually include heartburn drugs with the larger category of gastrointestinal-related-concerns drugs. I’m also certainly not about to remove birth-control and impotence drugs from the list when I know how HUGELY important they are to society and personal psychology in general. From sales, asthma and allergy drugs are probably more important than birth-control and impotence drugs, but asthma is so common nobody really thinks about it these days, and they certainly don’t receive as much public coverage or controversy as those drugs linked to reproduction. Some of these drugs can make or break companies. There have been huge corporate battles over these drugs, such as when Pfizer tried to protect Viagra by claiming that Bayer’s Levitra and Eli Lilly’s Cialis infringed on its patent rights. This is big business, and it’s just plain common sense that medicine is tied to everyone.
So, there you go: my list. Some of the drugs are given more interesting overviews than the others, but in general, I think I give a good “Pharmacologist’s Eye-view of the World’s Concerns” here. Send me a comment if you disagree.
NOEL’S LIST OF THE TOP TEN DRUGS NO CIVILIZATION ON EARTH SHOULD BE WITHOUT
1. Anti-Inflammatory and Pain Relief Drugs
Commonly known as: Aspirin, Acetaminophen, Ibuprofen, Codeine; Common Prescription Brand Names: Endocet, Roxicet, Tylox, Tylenol with Codeine nos. 1-4, Allay, Anexia, Bancap, Ceta-Plus, Dolacet, Hydrocet, Lorcet, Lortab, Margesic, Norco, Panacet, Percocet, Stagesic, Vicodin, Zydone, Talacen, OxyContin
This is without a doubt, the most widely-used class of drugs, if not for aspirin alone. There are so many combinations available, from simple generic aspirin, to prescription Tylenol with codeine. Most people are fine with over-the-counter retail drugs, but there several prescription ones out there that are much more potent, regulated, and fun to learn about. The narcotics in particular are popular among the underground, if not downright illegal. I find the opiods vastly interesting, but they work on the CNS and really deserve their own category. Some professors would have my neck for classifying them with the NSAIDS (non-steroidal anti-inflammatory drugs). Anyway, pain relief seems to be the most prominent concern in the drug world, and more of these drugs are consumed than any other.
2. Drugs for Bacterial Infections
Common Brand Names: Amoxil, Trimox, Larotid, Wymox, Augmentin, Marcillin, Omnipen, Probampacin, Spectrobid, Geocillin, Cloxapen, Dycill, Pathocil, Unipen, Bactocill, Pfizerpen, Beepen, Veetids
As with the first category, there are way too many drugs here for me to list. You all get the big idea: bacteria are bad and common and when they infect us (which is usually pretty often), we need to get rid of them quickly. I’ve only listed the beta-lactam inhibitors. They work by inhibiting cell wall synthesis in bacteria. There are some other more obscure and creative drugs out there, but I’m not a big fan of bacteriology and I’d rather move on.
3. Cholesterol-Inhibiting Drugs
Common Brand Names: Lipitor, Zocor, Lescol, Altocor, Mevacor, Advicor, Pravachol, Pravigard PAC, Crestor, Zetia
This is a big one. Most people don’t realize it, but this is actually THE biggest one, at least in terms of prescription drug sales. Pfizer’s Lipitor and Merck’s Zocor are the two most prescribed, used and lucrative drugs. Aside from the economic concerns, cholesterol-inhibiting drugs are really medically important. Obesity is a big issue in America and there is a push towards research in obesity-related drugs. Cholesterol synthesis isn’t exactly the same thing as being “fat,” but it’s a common medical concern, especially with age. I know so many adults that are taking these drugs nowadays it’s obscene. Many of them aren’t even “fat,” (in my humble opinion). Next time you go home, check your parent’s drug cabinet. Chances are, at least one of them will be taking these drugs.
4. Antidepressants and Antipsychotic Drugs
Common Brand Names: Prozac, Paxil, Zoloft, Wellbutrin, Effexor, Zyprexa, Dyprexa, Celexa, Lexapro, Sarafem, Luvox, Moclebemide, Harmala, Nardil, Parnate, Marplan
Aldous Huxley once wrote:
"Two thousand pharmacologists and bio-chemists were subsidized. Six years later it was being produced commercially. The perfect drug. Euphoric, narcotic, pleasantly hallucinant. All the advantages of Christianity and alcohol; none of their defects. Take a holiday from reality whenever you like, and come back without so much as a headache or a mythology. Stability was practically assured." (Brave New World)
These drugs have received so much coverage and controversy in recent years I just had to touch on it for my sake. Huxley paints a rather grim and sterile portrait of psychoactive drugs, but if you’ve ever taken any one of these antidepressants, you’ll know that they don’t really make you instantly happy and complacent but just “color” your mood, maybe sedate you a little, and potentially give you some motivation. The human mind is far more complicated than any molecule, and it’s a bit simplistic, in my opinion, to relegate so much responsibility on a drug. You are who you are and that’s not going to change by swallowing a pill. Depression and mental health concerns are a major life issue and it’s a pity these drugs aren’t given the respect they ought to have. I don’t think people really start appreciating the power of drugs until they start taking one of these drugs. Everyone takes drugs to cure some ailment in at least at some part of his or her life, but most people just swallow the pill and forget that it’s even working. Not so with the psychoactive drugs. These drugs have the potential to make a big difference -- and not one you’re likely to forget. I don’t give into many of the hogwash theories out there about antidepressants and antipsychotic drugs changing your personality and who you are. I firmly believe that these drugs help people and save lives. They have great potential, and they definitely deserve to be on top of this list.
5. Cancer-Inhibiting Drugs
Amifostine, Aminoglutethimide, Bicalutamide, Bleomycin, Cisplatin, Cladribine, Clodronate, Filgrastim, Goserelin, Hydroxyurea, Idarubicin, Letrozole, Leucovorin, Leuprolide, Medroxyprogesterone, Megestrol, Melphalan, Mitomycin, Pentostatin, Plicamycin, Porfimer, Tamoxifen, Testosterone, Thalidomide, Thioguanine, Tretinoin, Vindesine
I list the generic instead of the brand names here, because they seem to be more relevant in this field. There’s a real push in the biotechnology world to discover these drugs. Most of the chemotherapeutic drugs for cancer now are broad-acting and have a number of undesirable side effects. They target the rapidly-dividing cells in your body, which means cancer cells, but unfortunately hair cells, skin cells, endothelial (gut lining) cells, and a numerous host of other cells as well. This is why people in chemotherapy lose their hair and have such bad nausea all the time. Much more research needs to be done in this arena. There really hasn’t been a ground-breaking drug here that’s been both safe and effective.
6. Drugs for Viral Infections
Common Brand Names: Agenerase, Combivir, Retrovir, Epivir, Crixivan, Emtriva, Epivir, Epzicom, Fortovase, Fuzeon, Hivid, Invirase, Kaletra, Lexiva, Norvir, Rescriptor, Reyataz, Sustiva, Trizivir, Videx, Viracept, Viramune, Viread, Zerit, Ziagen
You’ll hear it time and time again: there is no cure for the common cold. There still isn’t. Yet, there is a push to discover new anti-viral drugs, and it’s mostly from one high-profile and controversial disease: AIDS. This virus has decimated certain minority populations and South Africa. No one drug has really risen above all others, but treatments often involve drug cocktails that prolong life by a certain percentage. The problems with viruses are that they live inside cells and can incorporate themselves unto our own DNA. The biology behind these drugs is truly fascinating, in part because there are so many hurdles to cross. Many of these drugs are protease inhibitors or nucleoside analog reverse transcriptase inhibitors. Their modes of action are very complex.
7. Heart and Antihypertensive Drugs
way more than I care to mention, but the ones I know are: Atenolol, Metoprolol, Nadolol, Propranolol, Timolol, Norvasc, Plavix, Catapres (Clonidine), Digitoxin, Digoxin
This is a large, large category, and it hurts me as biologist to just clump them all under #7. Some of these work on receptors, some are antiplatelet, and others have complex mechanisms that would just let me ramble on and on and bore you to death. To give you an idea of their complexity, these drugs are further classified into some of the following major categories: Angiotensin-converting Enzyme Inhibitors (ACE inhibitors), Angiotensin II Receptor Antagonists, Beta blockers, Blood Vessel Dilators (Vasodilators), Calcium Channel Blockers, Diuretics, and Nerve Blockers. It really takes a cardiopharmacologist to explain them all! The bottom line is: many people have heart and cardiovascular problems and these drugs are very important. With that said, let me move on and finish this list!
8. Estradiols and Birth-control Drugs
Common Brand Names: Alesse, Lessina, Aviane, Levlite, Cryselle, Loestrin, Levlen, Levora, Microgestin, Nordette, Lo/Ovral, Low-Orgestrel, Yasmin, Portia, Loestrin, Microgestin, Zovia, Ortho-Cyclen, Sprintec, Necon, Norinyl, Ortho-Novum, Nortrel, Demulen, Ortho-Cept, Zovia, OrthoEvra, Ovral, Brevicon, NuvaRing, Norplant II, Progestrasert, Mirena, Plan B, Preven
It’s a common fact of life: people have babies that they don’t necessarily want right away or can care for. It’s only been in the past several years that women have started widely using drugs to take control of their sex lives. Just think about how horrible a world would be if people couldn’t separate the recreational and affirmative values of sex from its reproductive ones. It would be just plain MEDIEVAL. I don’t think we can maintain a healthy society that way. There would be too much concealment, detachment, desolation, and repression for me. There’s no reason for a society to regress back to the Dark Ages if the technology exists. Birth-control drugs should be legal and implemented in all countries, especially in undeveloped ones where people need it most.
9. Impotence Drugs
Common Brand Names: Viagra, Levitra, Cialis
Not as many names here as the contraceptive drugs, but the ones listed are major. For years this was the problem that many older people had but couldn’t do anything or even talk about. Now, that’s changed. The discovery of Viagra and the other cGMP inhibitors for erectile dysfunction launched a new market that has been publicized widely. People are quick to criticize and make fun of these “sex drugs” but I think they do alot of serious good in the world. People have enough problems as it is and sexual frustrations with the person you love shouldn’t have to be one of them. These problems can accumulate and seriously do harm to a person’s psychology …so, if there’s a drug for it, why not? Viagra, Levitra, and Cialis go under #9 on my list.
10. Gastrointestinal Drugs
Common Brand Names: Aciphex, Cytotec, Zegerid, Carafate, Pepcid, Axid, Tagamet, Zantac, Imodium, Opium, Meridia, Nexium, Ogastro/Prevacid, Prevpac, Prilosec, Protonix, Xenical, Adipex, Lipram, Pancrease, Ultrase, Antivert, Zofram, Emend, MiraLax, Cephulac, Reglan, Bentyl, Anaspaz, Librax, Levsin, Asacol
Most of these drugs treat ulcers, which is a common medical concern. Some of them treat heartburn. The others are proton-pump inhibitors, antacids, stomach coatings, H2 blockers, or antibiotics. As you can see, this is really a general category that includes certain drug classes, and I could even throw some of them in with anti-inflammatory and pain-relief drugs if I wanted to. I don’t really have much to say about the gastrointestinal drugs, which I personally find to be rather dull, but gastrointestinal issues seem to be the number 2 general concern after pain relief and it would be a crime not to include them in “Noel’s List of the Top Ten Drugs no Civilization on Earth should be without.”
Other drugs that didn’t make it to my list:
If I could include more than 10, I would have definitely included allergy drugs, asthma drugs, osteoporosis drugs, heartburn drugs, drugs for anemia, and anti-diabetic drugs. So many people have allergies, an equally large percentage have asthma, nearly all of the women in my life will probably be taking osteoporosis drugs after 50; and heartburn, anemia, and diabetes are just HUGE concerns. However, I must restrain myself with just 10 drugs. It wouldn’t be right to remove gastrointestinal drugs when people suffer from stomach problems all the time. I conceptually include heartburn drugs with the larger category of gastrointestinal-related-concerns drugs. I’m also certainly not about to remove birth-control and impotence drugs from the list when I know how HUGELY important they are to society and personal psychology in general. From sales, asthma and allergy drugs are probably more important than birth-control and impotence drugs, but asthma is so common nobody really thinks about it these days, and they certainly don’t receive as much public coverage or controversy as those drugs linked to reproduction. Some of these drugs can make or break companies. There have been huge corporate battles over these drugs, such as when Pfizer tried to protect Viagra by claiming that Bayer’s Levitra and Eli Lilly’s Cialis infringed on its patent rights. This is big business, and it’s just plain common sense that medicine is tied to everyone.
So, there you go: my list. Some of the drugs are given more interesting overviews than the others, but in general, I think I give a good “Pharmacologist’s Eye-view of the World’s Concerns” here. Send me a comment if you disagree.
Tuesday, November 08, 2005
Wish me luck
The right time is any time that one is still so lucky as to have.
--Henry James
I have an exam today. I studied for it for the past two days, to the exclusion of most other activities. Wish me luck.
Noel Darlucio Pura
--Henry James
I have an exam today. I studied for it for the past two days, to the exclusion of most other activities. Wish me luck.
Noel Darlucio Pura
Sunday, November 06, 2005
No my friend, darkness is not everywhere, for here and there I find faces illuminated from within; paper lanterns among the dark trees.
--Carole Borges
Mike left two hours ago. I'm in the biomedical library studying for a mid-term exam, and the wind is blowing outside and from the clear pane of the window, I can see the sky turning to a soft gray as it transcends into nightfall. I'm such a softie when it comes to people leaving, even knowing that they'll come back eventually. So lonely tonight, and there's so much more to do...
Mike left two hours ago. I'm in the biomedical library studying for a mid-term exam, and the wind is blowing outside and from the clear pane of the window, I can see the sky turning to a soft gray as it transcends into nightfall. I'm such a softie when it comes to people leaving, even knowing that they'll come back eventually. So lonely tonight, and there's so much more to do...
Friday, November 04, 2005
That's coffee? You could run a small car on that thing...
After such a high-octane week, I feel a need for some closure. I started the day by getting up and nearly shooting my alarm clock to death as it startled me back to consciousness. I got two hours of sleep last night studying eicosanoids and prostaglandin synthesis and I wasn't about to back out now. I was dead worried about the pharmacology mid-term today, which I didn't expect to be easy by any standards. I left my apartment at 7 am and sped to the library as quickly as possible. I had a stale breakfast cookie on the way, and spent my two hours before class doing research on two venture capital firms. My entrepreneurship professor made the following announcement the day before:
Today’s guest speakers are Brian Halak and Andy Rachleff, both distinguished principals of top-tier venture capital firms.
Dr. Halak is a graduate of Penn Engineering and currently a Principal of Domain Associates, L.L.C. Founded in 1985, Domain is one of the top private equity firms with an exclusive focus on life sciences in the healthcare field. The firm is headquartered in Princeton, NJ with a second office in Laguna Niguel, CA. Domain’s three major investment segments are pharmaceuticals, specialty pharmaceuticals, and medical devices, while additional areas of interest include biomaterials, bioinstrumentation, and diagnostics...
Andy Rachleff was, until his recent retirement, a partner at Benchmark Capital, a top-tier venture capital firm in Silicon Valley. His primary focus had been on investments in the networking and communications areas, and he is widely recognized as one of the top venture capitalists in the country. Andy is now on the adjunct faculty at Stanford University where he teaches courses related to private equity and venture finance...
I never imagined business could so much fun, or be so intellectually stimulating…
I printed out my questions, went to statistics wondering if I could ever write the proof to any of the formulas we learn in class, showed up late for the Venture Capitalist lecture because I had to walk all the way from the medical school part of campus, had lunch which consisted of a slice of pizza and some soy, took a nap in a soft comfy chair in the library before exam fear woke me up thirty minutes later, crammed some more on voltage and ligand-gated ion channels and showed up for my pharmacology exam, bright, chipper and hyper. Then, I had dinner with Zeen, took a long, glorious three-hour break at the library watching television of all things, and arrived back home beat, sweaty and exhausted, but yet, feeling an odd deep sense of accomplishment. I shall go to sleep tonight dreaming about all the things I've seen and for once, not having the deadline of homework due tomorrow (that can wait another 24 hours). Some people may hate this kind of life, but I guess I'm just a sucker when it comes to anything remotely stimulating.
Today’s guest speakers are Brian Halak and Andy Rachleff, both distinguished principals of top-tier venture capital firms.
Dr. Halak is a graduate of Penn Engineering and currently a Principal of Domain Associates, L.L.C. Founded in 1985, Domain is one of the top private equity firms with an exclusive focus on life sciences in the healthcare field. The firm is headquartered in Princeton, NJ with a second office in Laguna Niguel, CA. Domain’s three major investment segments are pharmaceuticals, specialty pharmaceuticals, and medical devices, while additional areas of interest include biomaterials, bioinstrumentation, and diagnostics...
Andy Rachleff was, until his recent retirement, a partner at Benchmark Capital, a top-tier venture capital firm in Silicon Valley. His primary focus had been on investments in the networking and communications areas, and he is widely recognized as one of the top venture capitalists in the country. Andy is now on the adjunct faculty at Stanford University where he teaches courses related to private equity and venture finance...
I never imagined business could so much fun, or be so intellectually stimulating…
I printed out my questions, went to statistics wondering if I could ever write the proof to any of the formulas we learn in class, showed up late for the Venture Capitalist lecture because I had to walk all the way from the medical school part of campus, had lunch which consisted of a slice of pizza and some soy, took a nap in a soft comfy chair in the library before exam fear woke me up thirty minutes later, crammed some more on voltage and ligand-gated ion channels and showed up for my pharmacology exam, bright, chipper and hyper. Then, I had dinner with Zeen, took a long, glorious three-hour break at the library watching television of all things, and arrived back home beat, sweaty and exhausted, but yet, feeling an odd deep sense of accomplishment. I shall go to sleep tonight dreaming about all the things I've seen and for once, not having the deadline of homework due tomorrow (that can wait another 24 hours). Some people may hate this kind of life, but I guess I'm just a sucker when it comes to anything remotely stimulating.
Wednesday, November 02, 2005
The Unlively Hours
I like academia, but one thing that really bothers me about it, and one thing that makes industry seem really attractive to me (aside from actually having money), is the hours. In the workplace, working this many hours would be considered overtime, or even exploitation. In academia, working this many hours is considered a sign of “good character,” and it is encouraged and unchecked. An industry would never allow their workers to go on like this forever (for fear of losing their investment dollars if anything), but in a university, as much work is given for as little pay as possible, and students’ performances are measured on a curve...
Monday, October 31, 2005
Forget the Halloween costume. I look scary enough as it is.
After walking fifty blocks up and down Philadelphia, you would too. I had to walk from 38th St. to 12th St. and back, and then some from Sansom St. to Walnut St. What a perfect day to schedule a doctor's appointment in Center City. The whole intra-city public transporation system is down. Philly's roads are congested with traffic, pedestrians, loiterers, and poor college students as I speak. I'm divided as to where I stand on the SEPTA issue, but I know how my Halloween is going to be spent: studying, loitering around the library, terrorizing the computer labs, and trying to catch up on missed work. The one perk of the day was seeing the Philadelphia Stock Exhange on my way to the doctor. It was a small quaint little thing. You could maybe fit one elementary school inside. Don't you just love the holidays?
It's not easy being green
In response to a trivia question a friend asked me a while ago, I think Kermit is the Jim Henson Muppet character that suits me the best. He's small, green, shy, submissive, and cute -- the penultimate misunderstood frog. Yes, I think I like him the best...
I'm feeling lucky
I'm feeling lucky
Sunday, October 30, 2005
That strong, sweet, and supple quality
I SING the Body electric;
The armies of those I love engirth me, and I engirth them;
They will not let me off till I go with them, respond to them,
And discorrupt them, and charge them full with the charge of the Soul.
Was it doubted that those who corrupt their own bodies conceal themselves;
And if those who defile the living are as bad as they who defile the dead?
And if the body does not do as much as the Soul?
And if the body were not the Soul, what is the Soul?
The love of the Body of man or woman balks account—the body itself balks account;
That of the male is perfect, and that of the female is perfect.
The expression of the face balks account;
But the expression of a well-made man appears not only in his face;
It is in his limbs and joints also, it is curiously in the joints of his hips and wrists;
It is in his walk, the carriage of his neck, the flex of his waist and knees—dress does not hide him;
The strong, sweet, supple quality he has, strikes through the cotton and flannel;
To see him pass conveys as much as the best poem, perhaps more;
You linger to see his back, and the back of his neck and shoulder-side.
--Walt Whitman, from I Sing the Body Electric
...I love the male form. I love its hard lines and angles. I love the sharp features of the face, and the musculature that reminds of ancient Greece and the classicism of Michelangelo’s statuary. It is the same beauty I see in Renaissance architecture, Calvin Klein ads, and those black-and-white vintage photos of sailors in V-day. Of course, one hides under “art,” the other under “history,” and the last under a consumer marketing ploy aimed at affluent “heterosexual” males. It’s all the same -- primally, instinctually, and artistically; though the social “validity” and quality of the art form varies.
…and so, today, I woke up with a boy and he was warm and soft to touch and cuddled underneath my blanket. I opened my eyes, noticed that he was on the other side of the bed, wondering what he was doing so far away from me, and then, pulled him closer so that I could smell him and feel him hugging me. Then, misty and droopy-eyed, I yawned silently and went back to sleep.
I'm feeling lucky:
http://books.google.com/books?id=Yo7omlFkg1cC&pg=PA5&lpg=PA5&dq=noel+darlucio+pura&source=bl&ots=9wbhihIjrc&sig=1NF47bvSDd1TsTzwoHx2VbxakuQ&hl=en&sa=X&ei=kpevUcr4Iam80gH9p4H4Ag&ved=0CDcQ6AEwAg#v=onepage&q=noel%20darlucio%20pura&f=false
The armies of those I love engirth me, and I engirth them;
They will not let me off till I go with them, respond to them,
And discorrupt them, and charge them full with the charge of the Soul.
Was it doubted that those who corrupt their own bodies conceal themselves;
And if those who defile the living are as bad as they who defile the dead?
And if the body does not do as much as the Soul?
And if the body were not the Soul, what is the Soul?
The love of the Body of man or woman balks account—the body itself balks account;
That of the male is perfect, and that of the female is perfect.
The expression of the face balks account;
But the expression of a well-made man appears not only in his face;
It is in his limbs and joints also, it is curiously in the joints of his hips and wrists;
It is in his walk, the carriage of his neck, the flex of his waist and knees—dress does not hide him;
The strong, sweet, supple quality he has, strikes through the cotton and flannel;
To see him pass conveys as much as the best poem, perhaps more;
You linger to see his back, and the back of his neck and shoulder-side.
--Walt Whitman, from I Sing the Body Electric
...I love the male form. I love its hard lines and angles. I love the sharp features of the face, and the musculature that reminds of ancient Greece and the classicism of Michelangelo’s statuary. It is the same beauty I see in Renaissance architecture, Calvin Klein ads, and those black-and-white vintage photos of sailors in V-day. Of course, one hides under “art,” the other under “history,” and the last under a consumer marketing ploy aimed at affluent “heterosexual” males. It’s all the same -- primally, instinctually, and artistically; though the social “validity” and quality of the art form varies.
…and so, today, I woke up with a boy and he was warm and soft to touch and cuddled underneath my blanket. I opened my eyes, noticed that he was on the other side of the bed, wondering what he was doing so far away from me, and then, pulled him closer so that I could smell him and feel him hugging me. Then, misty and droopy-eyed, I yawned silently and went back to sleep.
I'm feeling lucky:
http://books.google.com/books?id=Yo7omlFkg1cC&pg=PA5&lpg=PA5&dq=noel+darlucio+pura&source=bl&ots=9wbhihIjrc&sig=1NF47bvSDd1TsTzwoHx2VbxakuQ&hl=en&sa=X&ei=kpevUcr4Iam80gH9p4H4Ag&ved=0CDcQ6AEwAg#v=onepage&q=noel%20darlucio%20pura&f=false
Thursday, October 27, 2005
B.D. Wong
B.D. Wong came to my school today for Asian Pacific American Heritage Week. He’s a pleasant guy. Much more interesting in person than on the screen. Unbelievably casual and funny, and much more intelligent than his roles typically display. He’s about the only attractive Asian-American male I’ve seen on TV, which understandably, means something to me living here (take it for what you will).
Taken from: http://www.glbtq.com/arts/wong_bd.html
The only actor to win the Tony Award, the Drama Desk Award, the Outer Critics Circle Award, the Clarence Derwent Award, and the Theater World Award for the same performance, Asian-American actor B. D. Wong came to prominence with his extraordinary performance in the title role of David Hwang's M. Butterfly (1988).
Wong's film roles have varied from a campy caterer in The Father of the Bride (1991) to a geneticist in Jurassic Park (1993) and a member of an elite anti-terrorist unit in Executive Decision (1996). He was happy to supply the voice of Captain Li Shang in the Disney animated feature Mulan (1998) because the story was one Wong had learned as a child from his parents. He repeated the role in the 2004 sequel Mulan II.
Wong has also appeared in the off-Broadway production of the Irving Berlin-Moss Hart musical As Thousands Cheer (1998) and as Linus in the Broadway revival of the musical You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown (1999). He has made dozens of guest appearances on television series such as Law and Order: Special Victims Unit, Chicago Hope, Sesame Street, and The X-Files.
Taken from: http://www.glbtq.com/arts/wong_bd.html
The only actor to win the Tony Award, the Drama Desk Award, the Outer Critics Circle Award, the Clarence Derwent Award, and the Theater World Award for the same performance, Asian-American actor B. D. Wong came to prominence with his extraordinary performance in the title role of David Hwang's M. Butterfly (1988).
Wong's film roles have varied from a campy caterer in The Father of the Bride (1991) to a geneticist in Jurassic Park (1993) and a member of an elite anti-terrorist unit in Executive Decision (1996). He was happy to supply the voice of Captain Li Shang in the Disney animated feature Mulan (1998) because the story was one Wong had learned as a child from his parents. He repeated the role in the 2004 sequel Mulan II.
Wong has also appeared in the off-Broadway production of the Irving Berlin-Moss Hart musical As Thousands Cheer (1998) and as Linus in the Broadway revival of the musical You're a Good Man, Charlie Brown (1999). He has made dozens of guest appearances on television series such as Law and Order: Special Victims Unit, Chicago Hope, Sesame Street, and The X-Files.
Five Things
Five Things I can Rely On in Life
(1) Good, old, filling Chinese food: typical college fare
(2) An Apple succeeding where other computers have failed: more on this later, but keep in mind that for the past three years I've had a Compaq, or a Compsuck as I like to call it.
(3) index funds: goodbye volatility!
(4) Mike!
(5) coffee: understood
I'm feeling lucky
:-)
(1) Good, old, filling Chinese food: typical college fare
(2) An Apple succeeding where other computers have failed: more on this later, but keep in mind that for the past three years I've had a Compaq, or a Compsuck as I like to call it.
(3) index funds: goodbye volatility!
(4) Mike!
(5) coffee: understood
I'm feeling lucky
:-)
The Google Zeitgeist
Check it out.
If the Dow Jones and the S&P500 are indices of the stock market, than the Google Zeitgeist is supposedly an index of our culture. It's a collection of the most popular search queries in a given time period, and potentially, a given concern or obsession of our time. Want to know if something is a fad? Then look for "Survivor" or "American Idol" in the Declining Queries list. Look for "World Trade Center" and "Osama bin Laden" after 9/11, and for fun, look for "Nostradamus" around Y2K. Interesting, no?
BTW, Zeitgeist means: the spirit of the time; the taste and outlook characteristic of a period or generation -- at least according to dictionary.com. It comes from the German words Zeit (time) and Geist (spirit), like Poltergeist. :-)
Congratulations to our winners!
http://www.drew.edu/english/prizes-and-awards
If the Dow Jones and the S&P500 are indices of the stock market, than the Google Zeitgeist is supposedly an index of our culture. It's a collection of the most popular search queries in a given time period, and potentially, a given concern or obsession of our time. Want to know if something is a fad? Then look for "Survivor" or "American Idol" in the Declining Queries list. Look for "World Trade Center" and "Osama bin Laden" after 9/11, and for fun, look for "Nostradamus" around Y2K. Interesting, no?
BTW, Zeitgeist means: the spirit of the time; the taste and outlook characteristic of a period or generation -- at least according to dictionary.com. It comes from the German words Zeit (time) and Geist (spirit), like Poltergeist. :-)
Congratulations to our winners!
http://www.drew.edu/english/prizes-and-awards
Wednesday, October 26, 2005
Biotech Blues
Pfizer (PFE) is down to $21 a share. It was at $25 in the beginning of October. At the height of the mid-summer heat in June, it was at $29 a share. The stock has taken a hit but the company is actually still strong, with varenincline completing Phase III. I wanted to buy some shares of the company this week, but Sharebuilder wouldn’t let me, because it was already past 2pm Pacific Standard Time. I hate how Sharebuilder is trying to make me an investor when I’m actually more of a trader, but I have to stick with it for now because I’m still a poor college student. I have to wait till next week to buy PFE. Pfizer better stay at $21, at least until I buy it. For those of you with no shares in the biotech industry, now would be a great time to join. Biotech stocks are dirt cheap now, but they won’t be for long. Buy a couple of shares of Amgen, Genentech, or Merck; or Proctor & Gamble and Johnson & Johnson if you find prescription drugs too risky.
Sunday, October 23, 2005
Time and the hour run through the roughest day
--Willy Shakes
What a glorious weekend this was: dancing, partying, carousing Philadelphia, running in the rain, and leaving a club with a crowd of people I just met fifteen minutes ago. This must be what youth is: to embrace spontaneity and expect the unexpected, but the best part of it was also that Mike was there with me, letting me feel loved in a crowd of anonymous bodies and letting me know that I could always bail out if things didn’t go exactly according to plan. Mike came to visit me this Friday and left this morning, and today was a mess of hurrying, scuffling, and going over train schedules. Then, the library and what seems like endless amounts of work: capital venture problem set, term project, and mid-term exam Tuesday. Sometimes I feel like life goes so fast, I have to run just to catch up with it. I have meetings upon meetings to schedule, and doctors, professors, and study groups to visit. I’m glad that Mike takes the time to visit me knowing I can’t quite visit him. The trip takes at least three hours, it’s taxing and disheartening, but he doesn’t complain. He just calls every once in awhile and I get to listen to his warm, cuddly voice on the phone. Last time I was swamped with work and had to study for an exam, and what does he do? He comes over in the rain, stays in my apartment doing laundry and folding clothes, and waits for me to come back and have dinner three hours later. If people were selections of food, he’d be a layered sponge cake: warm, sweet, and filling! There just isn’t enough sugar in the world to make another boy like that. You know that saying about “breaking the mold”? Well, at the very real risk of sounding corny, I’d say it was a cupcake pan.
What a glorious weekend this was: dancing, partying, carousing Philadelphia, running in the rain, and leaving a club with a crowd of people I just met fifteen minutes ago. This must be what youth is: to embrace spontaneity and expect the unexpected, but the best part of it was also that Mike was there with me, letting me feel loved in a crowd of anonymous bodies and letting me know that I could always bail out if things didn’t go exactly according to plan. Mike came to visit me this Friday and left this morning, and today was a mess of hurrying, scuffling, and going over train schedules. Then, the library and what seems like endless amounts of work: capital venture problem set, term project, and mid-term exam Tuesday. Sometimes I feel like life goes so fast, I have to run just to catch up with it. I have meetings upon meetings to schedule, and doctors, professors, and study groups to visit. I’m glad that Mike takes the time to visit me knowing I can’t quite visit him. The trip takes at least three hours, it’s taxing and disheartening, but he doesn’t complain. He just calls every once in awhile and I get to listen to his warm, cuddly voice on the phone. Last time I was swamped with work and had to study for an exam, and what does he do? He comes over in the rain, stays in my apartment doing laundry and folding clothes, and waits for me to come back and have dinner three hours later. If people were selections of food, he’d be a layered sponge cake: warm, sweet, and filling! There just isn’t enough sugar in the world to make another boy like that. You know that saying about “breaking the mold”? Well, at the very real risk of sounding corny, I’d say it was a cupcake pan.
Thursday, October 20, 2005
"I was in the German Club. There were only three of us, and then two of us left to join the French Club after seeing 'Schindler's List.'"
Thank god this day is over! Now I can sit back, read blogs, watch The Gilmore Girls and be a couch potato for the next several hours. Today was tough. I woke up at 5 am to go the library and finish my Statistics and Entrepreneurship homework, which I found particularly long because we have a Statistics exam Monday, and then I had to prepare for a CEO coming to Penn to talk to my Entrepreneurship class, this time for a medical devices company.
Entrepreneurship announcement:
Today’s guest speaker is Michael Cannon, co-founder and president of Ecton, Inc. Ecton was founded in 1996 with the goal of developing “technologies which allow cardiac ultrasound to become a screening and monitoring tool, instead of merely an expensive diagnostic laboratory method.” Ecton was acquired by Acuson Corporation in 1999, which in turn was acquired by Siemens Medical Engineering Group in 2000. Mr. Cannon led the Ecton team through both acquisitions.
That was interesting, don’t get me wrong, but seeing as how I had to wake up at 5 to prepare for two classes, I didn’t have much to go on afterwards. Then, I went to the lab to section some embryos. Dr. Tremblay is letting me work with her samples now. I don’t just section practice embryos from now on. Then I went to my statistics recitation to look at last year’s mid-term exam. I’ve been absolutely mortified about it for several days now, but looking at last year’s exam partially put my fears to rest. It is definitely manageable, and I think the probability of me doing well is rather high. Let’s see me calculate that Dr. Ewens! I’m absolutely burned out from the past three days. It was supposed to be our fall break, but I don’t think it really applied to graduate students. My pharmacology class still met Monday and Tuesday, and our new lecturer for arachidonic acid metabolites and anti-inflammatory drugs strikes me as a bit of an academic dominatrix (but don’t tell her I ever said that!). To top it off, my shares have been rather turbulent. All of these recent hurricanes have done a number to oil prices and the natural resources sector. I wonder how it will continue to affect the market, but so far, the financial services industries I’ve been tracking seem to be rather stable.
I’m just going to put all my worries aside for the moment and watch The Gilmore Girls. I was introduced to it several years ago, but I could never make the listed times to watch it. Now that I’ve found a place to rent the DVD’s, I actually can. TV has disappointed me for the most part, but The Gilmore Girls is a great show. It’s so much better than Dawson’s Creek, which my sister used to watch and which I absolutely hated. That entire show focused on the melodramatic relationships of moody teens trying to hook up with one another, and once each guy dated each girl in every possible combination you could imagine, they exhausted all of their possibilities and had to constantly showcase “new talent” to keep it going. The Gilmore Girls is different. It has substance, character, sincerity, comedy, and witty repartee! But what am I doing writing about it? I should be watching!
I'm feeling lucky:
http://books.google.com/books?id=Yo7omlFkg1cC&pg=PA5&lpg=PA5&dq=noel+darlucio+pura&source=bl&ots=9wbhihIjrc&sig=1NF47bvSDd1TsTzwoHx2VbxakuQ&hl=en&sa=X&ei=kpevUcr4Iam80gH9p4H4Ag&ved=0CDcQ6AEwAg#v=onepage&q=noel%20darlucio%20pura&f=false
Entrepreneurship announcement:
Today’s guest speaker is Michael Cannon, co-founder and president of Ecton, Inc. Ecton was founded in 1996 with the goal of developing “technologies which allow cardiac ultrasound to become a screening and monitoring tool, instead of merely an expensive diagnostic laboratory method.” Ecton was acquired by Acuson Corporation in 1999, which in turn was acquired by Siemens Medical Engineering Group in 2000. Mr. Cannon led the Ecton team through both acquisitions.
That was interesting, don’t get me wrong, but seeing as how I had to wake up at 5 to prepare for two classes, I didn’t have much to go on afterwards. Then, I went to the lab to section some embryos. Dr. Tremblay is letting me work with her samples now. I don’t just section practice embryos from now on. Then I went to my statistics recitation to look at last year’s mid-term exam. I’ve been absolutely mortified about it for several days now, but looking at last year’s exam partially put my fears to rest. It is definitely manageable, and I think the probability of me doing well is rather high. Let’s see me calculate that Dr. Ewens! I’m absolutely burned out from the past three days. It was supposed to be our fall break, but I don’t think it really applied to graduate students. My pharmacology class still met Monday and Tuesday, and our new lecturer for arachidonic acid metabolites and anti-inflammatory drugs strikes me as a bit of an academic dominatrix (but don’t tell her I ever said that!). To top it off, my shares have been rather turbulent. All of these recent hurricanes have done a number to oil prices and the natural resources sector. I wonder how it will continue to affect the market, but so far, the financial services industries I’ve been tracking seem to be rather stable.
I’m just going to put all my worries aside for the moment and watch The Gilmore Girls. I was introduced to it several years ago, but I could never make the listed times to watch it. Now that I’ve found a place to rent the DVD’s, I actually can. TV has disappointed me for the most part, but The Gilmore Girls is a great show. It’s so much better than Dawson’s Creek, which my sister used to watch and which I absolutely hated. That entire show focused on the melodramatic relationships of moody teens trying to hook up with one another, and once each guy dated each girl in every possible combination you could imagine, they exhausted all of their possibilities and had to constantly showcase “new talent” to keep it going. The Gilmore Girls is different. It has substance, character, sincerity, comedy, and witty repartee! But what am I doing writing about it? I should be watching!
I'm feeling lucky:
http://books.google.com/books?id=Yo7omlFkg1cC&pg=PA5&lpg=PA5&dq=noel+darlucio+pura&source=bl&ots=9wbhihIjrc&sig=1NF47bvSDd1TsTzwoHx2VbxakuQ&hl=en&sa=X&ei=kpevUcr4Iam80gH9p4H4Ag&ved=0CDcQ6AEwAg#v=onepage&q=noel%20darlucio%20pura&f=false
Tuesday, October 18, 2005
Wickedly
Have you ever wondered what it would be like to be a Wicked Witch of Oz?...
To my dear sister, the Wicked Witch of the West,
I’ve been evading falling houses since that accident with the tornado spell last spring. A cow fell on me and It’s put a bit of a dent in my walk I’m afraid. I can hardly ride my broomstick straight anymore! I was very happy to receive your letter though. Adjusting to a new place can be tough -- poisoning all the new apples, terrorizing the village locals, sacrificing a virgin munchkin here and there. It really puts quite a strain on your back! I’ve been very busy with my new shift at Emerald City. I can’t seem to find the time to write spells or curses anymore, which is horrendous since I used to major in scroll-writing and enchantments. I thank you for the polymorph potion. I haven’t had a good draught of that since I was a little witch in school!
I’m glad to know that Witching School is going well for you. I hear you’re taking thaumaturgy, eh? I know you can handle it. Have you gotten into chopping up any corpses yet? That’s always been something I’ve wanted to do, getting to know humans from the “inside.” I’ve always wanted to feel a human brain pulsating from the meninges... but that’s a story for later, and I bet you’re still busy from trying to find a heart for that tin experiment you’ve been working on.
It’s great that you’ve met Mr. E. Wizard. He used to be my bench-mate at WWU (Witches and Wizards University). We used to collect bat wings and make hell potions together, but he was always full of hot air and wild fantastical stories. I haven’t seen him in ages!
As for me, I’m holding up well. Emerald City is all I’ve imagined it to be, but it’s a bit hard sometimes to find the time to do the things you love to do, like writing new hexes under the full night moon, or taking a lonely flying monkey out for a stroll. Though I’m in the city now, I find that I spend most of my time in the Enchanted Forest, collecting plants and mushrooms to throw in my tiny little cauldron. I haven’t made as many friends as I thought I would, but I know of this one wizard who likes to copy down spells from the Ancients Wing of the Library, and I hear that the Witch of the South is studying mythological animals in a cave not too far off mine. I may just visit her to borrow a cup of dragon’s blood and sugar one day. Who knows? Maybe we’ll even rent a tower out together.
Overall life can be a bit tough in the Emerald City, but I like it. I never have to worry about finding something to match my green skin anymore. Do you remember how hard that used to be? Sometimes when I’m tired and groggy and have finished making all my potions for the day, I sit down and think about my old life in Munchkin Land and all the wonderful things I used to do there. I don’t think I really appreciated it at the time, but all the things I needed were there -- my hazelwood broomstick, my dungeon made of yellow bricks, the half-pint subservients, and even a personal army of crows I started from scratch! Then, of course, there was you: my dear wicked sister, to come home to and cook villagers with. It’s different down here in Emerald City. You get bored from looking at green gemstones all day, and you’ll eventually have to get sunglasses to protect yourself from the glare of all the bright inhabitants! I’ll probably never get a full night’s sleep here from all the terrorizing they have me doing, but thankfully, the city never sleeps itself. The Emerald library is brimming with young witches, wizards, and other late-nighters like myself, and at least I don’t feel the boredom anymore of being an overworked witch in an understaffed province of the country.
I’m currently studying advanced potions making and magical alterations, which seem to go hand in hand. I’m taking a global enchantments course too, which is interesting because now they have us summoning large tornados and hurricanes. Who knows how good I’ll get at it? I may get powerful enough to lift a house one day. Do tell me about your life in Munchkin Land. I’m so grateful that you’ve decided to take over my shift. I’m beginning to miss the place more and more each day. I think of it now as the kind of place a witch would like to grow old and die in one day... but, enough talk about that. Write back to me, and come visit your lonely wicked old sister in the city.
Missing you wickedly,
The Wicked Witch of the East
To my dear sister, the Wicked Witch of the West,
I’ve been evading falling houses since that accident with the tornado spell last spring. A cow fell on me and It’s put a bit of a dent in my walk I’m afraid. I can hardly ride my broomstick straight anymore! I was very happy to receive your letter though. Adjusting to a new place can be tough -- poisoning all the new apples, terrorizing the village locals, sacrificing a virgin munchkin here and there. It really puts quite a strain on your back! I’ve been very busy with my new shift at Emerald City. I can’t seem to find the time to write spells or curses anymore, which is horrendous since I used to major in scroll-writing and enchantments. I thank you for the polymorph potion. I haven’t had a good draught of that since I was a little witch in school!
I’m glad to know that Witching School is going well for you. I hear you’re taking thaumaturgy, eh? I know you can handle it. Have you gotten into chopping up any corpses yet? That’s always been something I’ve wanted to do, getting to know humans from the “inside.” I’ve always wanted to feel a human brain pulsating from the meninges... but that’s a story for later, and I bet you’re still busy from trying to find a heart for that tin experiment you’ve been working on.
It’s great that you’ve met Mr. E. Wizard. He used to be my bench-mate at WWU (Witches and Wizards University). We used to collect bat wings and make hell potions together, but he was always full of hot air and wild fantastical stories. I haven’t seen him in ages!
As for me, I’m holding up well. Emerald City is all I’ve imagined it to be, but it’s a bit hard sometimes to find the time to do the things you love to do, like writing new hexes under the full night moon, or taking a lonely flying monkey out for a stroll. Though I’m in the city now, I find that I spend most of my time in the Enchanted Forest, collecting plants and mushrooms to throw in my tiny little cauldron. I haven’t made as many friends as I thought I would, but I know of this one wizard who likes to copy down spells from the Ancients Wing of the Library, and I hear that the Witch of the South is studying mythological animals in a cave not too far off mine. I may just visit her to borrow a cup of dragon’s blood and sugar one day. Who knows? Maybe we’ll even rent a tower out together.
Overall life can be a bit tough in the Emerald City, but I like it. I never have to worry about finding something to match my green skin anymore. Do you remember how hard that used to be? Sometimes when I’m tired and groggy and have finished making all my potions for the day, I sit down and think about my old life in Munchkin Land and all the wonderful things I used to do there. I don’t think I really appreciated it at the time, but all the things I needed were there -- my hazelwood broomstick, my dungeon made of yellow bricks, the half-pint subservients, and even a personal army of crows I started from scratch! Then, of course, there was you: my dear wicked sister, to come home to and cook villagers with. It’s different down here in Emerald City. You get bored from looking at green gemstones all day, and you’ll eventually have to get sunglasses to protect yourself from the glare of all the bright inhabitants! I’ll probably never get a full night’s sleep here from all the terrorizing they have me doing, but thankfully, the city never sleeps itself. The Emerald library is brimming with young witches, wizards, and other late-nighters like myself, and at least I don’t feel the boredom anymore of being an overworked witch in an understaffed province of the country.
I’m currently studying advanced potions making and magical alterations, which seem to go hand in hand. I’m taking a global enchantments course too, which is interesting because now they have us summoning large tornados and hurricanes. Who knows how good I’ll get at it? I may get powerful enough to lift a house one day. Do tell me about your life in Munchkin Land. I’m so grateful that you’ve decided to take over my shift. I’m beginning to miss the place more and more each day. I think of it now as the kind of place a witch would like to grow old and die in one day... but, enough talk about that. Write back to me, and come visit your lonely wicked old sister in the city.
Missing you wickedly,
The Wicked Witch of the East
Thursday, October 13, 2005
anticipations
Tomorrow night, for my entrepreneurship class, my professor and some of his friends assembled a team of business leaders and professionals to visit the class. They’re going to be discussing start-up strategies for new companies and how they grew their own businesses. I’m going to be meeting a CEO of a software publishing company, a CTO (chief technology officer) of an information technology company, a co-founder of an agricultural products biotech company, a CEO of a medical devices biotech company, a Chairman of an integrated health management company, and a CEO of an Asian-American Bank. It’s going to be quite intense and I’m expecting it to be very well attended. I’m so excited! How am I going to get any sleep!
Wednesday, October 12, 2005
First Muse
I may never make it big, but after a long day of work, I should be content to sit down, have a pleasant cup of coffee, and take my day into perspective. Science may be my new life now, but there is a world outside of it too. Stepping into the hard streets of the city, watching the window displays, waiting for the traffic lights to turn green, I remind myself that there is a life outside of the university. It seems so far to me now, but I’ll have to live with it one day, call it my home, and hope that it will take me in. Fear of the world wraps around me like a blanket. Even within these walls I fear I’m not content. I go to class, do my work, and hand in my papers dearly hoping to have it come back to me with an A. I know what I’m doing, but it’s just that I fear becoming a number -- that’s what it is. That’s the danger of becoming a science major. Coming from where I’m coming from, I fear that I’ve lost my voice. I have no time to read literature or write. I must accept now that I’m no longer an English major. This is the path I’ve chosen, it is what I want, and I must write only when my work allows. Writing used to be my work, but it is no longer my career. Biology is. Science will buy me a nice home and put food on the table. For that I can live with myself. I can write when I finally feel secure, and that time will come eventually, just not today. Sometimes I miss the romance of being an artist -- living on a whim, observing the small details -- thinking that I was better than other people, that I saw more than them, and that somehow this gave me more of a right to live than they do. There’s more to being a poet than that of course. I know that kind of thinking is flawed and the kind of thinking a writer would have in high school -- but I encountered it first entering this field, and now that I’m leaving it, I acknowledge it for what it is. I am convinced that poets do live intensely, and yes, I want that for myself as well. I always have. I just can’t embrace it wholly. I have to compromise. I have a need to feel useful and to make money. As much as I like poetry, there are times when I feel it is unread, and I would be under-appreciated. I think that my time would be better spent doing something else, and so I turn to researching drugs and trying to help people. Poetry helps people as well, but it’s hard to convince myself of that when I am down, and I just can’t get over the fear of never making it at all. I think I am doing what is best for now. I am putting my other interests on hold, but with the promise to pick it up again one day. I like it too much to give it up. It’s a part of me, and it comes out when it needs to. When I lose my voice is when I lose my soul, and that is when I become another number-crunching, data-generating machine. I don’t want that. I’ll never become that. I like the “humanism” of work too much for that, and I think that work should bring people together more so than it alienates them. I like writing. I like doing this at the end of the day. It helps me reclaim that part of me that is unique, something no one else can claim, and then I am no longer a name on a list competing for a grade, but a person. I’m not just merely the sum of my clothes, my grades, or my networth, but a person with ideas, aspirations, and fears. I am myself -- but who, if not for my writing, would ever know that?
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